Today, I asked my boyfriend what he thinks about long term relationships. He said, "Our relationship is kinda like having a dog. Chances are, your dog is going to die pretty quickly, before you do. Dogs and humans just aren't meant to be together forever." He compared me to a dying dog. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of over a year said that being in a relationship is pointless. When I responded that I couldn't picture my life without him, he said he couldn't picture his life without our cat. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years told me that he sees no future with me. It's alright though, because he says we can still "coast along" until he meets someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend said we needed to talk. He called me cruel, cold and heartless and that it’s making him reconsider what kind of future we may have together. All because I hate sappy movies and don’t cry on the scenes where the dogs die. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend of 3 years what he thought about marriage in the future. "Who knows? We might meet other people soon." FML
Today, after calling my boyfriend and telling him that my dog had just died, he hesitated and stuttered, "She was old, sick, and suffering. Babe, it was her time to go." He then informed me he had to go to his friend's house and hung up. My dog was two years-old, in great health, and was hit by a car. FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML
Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he isn't sure about me anymore. He said he saw a quote on Facebook that a guy can be with a girl for 10 years, then leave, and be with a girl for one and marry that girl. Meanwhile, I've been planning on the rest of my life with him in my head. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
Today, I realized my boyfriend rather qualifies as a pet: He loves eating, he hardly ever talks or listens, but he is cuddly, always enjoys having me around and can – within limits - be trained to do useful things. FML
Today, I'm in a relationship with a guy who yells at me everyday for things I didn't do, is in a dead-end job and is not attractive whatsoever, but I can't bring myself to break up with him because he would get to keep the dog. FML
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Top comments
TheKitchenSink 0
I have a friend who got compared to ice cream in a breakup. "Girls are like ice cream...you have to try all the flavors before you choose one"
genius_man16 1
Ok, first off, you should dump him. Secondly, does that make any sense to anyone? Maybe i'm just tired but...
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Comments (102)
TMX666 1
That's when you tell him to f-off and dump the asshole. He doesn't care about you or the relationship in the long run, that's obvious in his statement.
JuJuBeeSunshine 0
When he finds the right girl, he'll want to make it last. When a guy says something like that, it means he doesn't want to be with YOU, because rest assured; when he finds a girl he loves, he's not gonna let her go. Read Greg Behrendt's "He's Just Not That Into You." Your boyfriend is one of the guys Greg talks about.
AmericansAreDumb 0
That's not always the case Mr. 83.
rnegi 0
Just a dog? :(
24788 7
That's a horrible analogy.
ShadowSEAL 0
Haha
MadeOfAwesome 1
You have to read into what he said... He was actually calling you a bitch... Bitch=female dog. So you're a dying bitch xP
Vampireguy123 0
woahh I don't understand at all... way to confusingg...
YaItzFatality 0
Aww that sucks "/ were assholes.
thrillhouse100 0
hahaha thats hilarious
Klink_fml 3
hey is he wrong though look at a high school relationship. some even don't even last a week. and in the adult world people come and go a lot and that is the point of dating. to find out if you can live with that person forever. 9 times out of 10 don't work out lol. I see your boyfriends point