Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after the last few months of my sister living with me while she finds her feet, I asked if she could help me out by doing the washing up. Half an hour later, I walked into knee high dish soap foam in the kitchen. My sister was right in the middle, trying to sculpt dicks. She's 20. FML
Today, my brother ran in, handed me a spatula, and told me to stand still. Barely a second later, our sister came tearing in the house with a fresh, raised welt on her ass cheek in the shape of said spatula, saw me holding said spatula, and kicked my ass up and down the house until I escaped. FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Today, I tried to prank my brother with the butter floor prank after coming back from work. As a result, my brother stepped out of ER with an arm cast, stitches on his head and a neck collar. FML
Today, I had to remove my brother's pubic hairs from the bathtub before bathing my son. FML
Today, my 4-year-old twin sons discovered how to lock doors. They locked me out of the house while I was taking out the trash. I had to climb through the kitchen window, which they'd generously smeared with peanut butter. FML
Today, I gave my sister some Lubriderm for a skin condition we share. While she was applying the lotion I joking said, "Wouldn't it be funny if it made it worse?" Guess who got punched in the face, twice, because it did. FML
Today, my brother sprayed the entire kitchen, including all the dishes, with industrial strength spray adhesive, thinking it was disinfectant. I'm the one who got to clean it up. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
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Top comments
iseyixes 18
What a good age to experiment! The good ole days!!!!
The1CalledGOAT 11
so, you are upset that you missed all the greasing up action?
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Comments (85)
shaebayla 6
Your siblings seem innovative and adventurous. Join them, you will probably have fun since you worked hard all day! Just make sure you have them clean the mess up afterwards....after all it was their idea to begin with...and you're older :-)
KingCeltic77 18
At least they're not in front of the TV.
dankoneon 3
Fyl but that's funny as hell!
B4DG3R 4
I wish my family was that cool!
lemonademixer 7
I wish my sister was as fun as yours.
2112mike 4
He would need to be naked for it to work properly... So that's pretty gross..
patchyu 18
Kids will be kids :]
LexieWins 0
Why were they unsupervised? At 12 and 8, someone should have noticed this was happening.
asianhero 1
A0
graphicstyle7 17
Sounds like the start of a family joke that will never die. Now is the time to nickname him "Greasy".