Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, I taught my 18 month-old daughter to wipe the green, snotty mucus from under her nose with a tissue. To which, like a ninja, she then wiped my open-mouthed upper lip with that same snotty tissue. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 7-year-old son that it's not okay to smell others' "wieners". FML
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML
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Top comments
ApollosMyth 22
Well, I hope it was snot too hard to explain.
KylieMangion 22
I cannot believe why a grown man would do that to his own baby O.O
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Comments (99)
dukie420 4
Neither are you!
simoncat 11
Oh boy! And you chose the procreate with this one. Yippee for us; society. Sorry,OP. that was mean. I apologize. You're not the bad guy, the idiot you bred with is.
emirie 21
That's a little harsh.
Sk8in 1
He is what kids call the boogey monster...if that makes sense
Omniprism 15
Gross. Wtf is his problem? On the bright side your baby's immune system is going to be great.
MichaelArvizu 1
This reminds me of Family Guy where Peter does this to Meg haha
caircair 3
I pray the child has the OP's brains - daddy certainly doesn't seem to have any!
hickfromthestick 5
where do you want him to wipe them.
teacupofsunshine 29
This made me mad,people are crying for a kid and your idiot husband uses his kid as a tissue . I'd be pissed if I was in your shoe!