Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidently sent that my butthole was on fire to a group chat with my boss. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML
Today, my boss slapped me on the ass and said, "Good work, princess." FML
Today, for some reason, I called my boss "Mum" in a meeting. To make it worse, I panicked and followed it up with, “Can I have a raise?” Everyone laughed except my boss. FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Hell yes!" in front of a potential employer and a group of kids before an interview at a daycare center. FML
Today, I was on a work call when my coworker made an accidental Freudian slip. Thinking I was muted, I muttered, "That’s what she said." I wasn’t muted. FML
Today, at a company event, there was a break. The Blue Danube was playing. Bored, I absentmindedly start singing, “My butt is ugly” to the melody. I forgot that my mic was on and the whole auditorium heard. Not only was I sent home, but my boss wants to “discuss” it on Monday at the office. FML
Today, at work, my manager accidentally bumped into me, brushing my behind with the back of his hand. He was a bit embarrassed, so I jokingly said, “You could at least buy me dinner first!” He went to HR and told them I made him uncomfortable. I was just trying to lighten the mood. FML
Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work, trying to keep my composure. I quietly shifted in my chair and accidentally let out a fart. It echoed in the conference room, and everyone stared at me in stunned silence. My boss sarcastically said, “Well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
Oh Butters, how you should restrain yourself...
sheethapins 13
At least you didn't ask him if he wanted to do it in the butt, in your butt.
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Comments (109)
scarface90 8
I do the same thing with "that's what she said" jokes, sometimes I feel like my brain can't control my mouth
BrimfullOfAsher 20
I do that with "Like your Mom" comments.
boofgall 16
I said WHAT WHAT?
SonOfAMitch 14
IN THE BUTT!
chlorinegreen 27
I feel like the cupcake is yelling the song lol
klovemachine 24
My new favorite FML :)
Shadow_Phantom 26
From the sounds of it, your boss doesn't have a sense of humor. I would have laughed and gave you a pat on the shoulder. FYL.
darkhakai 18
Nowhere in the FML does it imply that the boss did not find it amusing. It could just be the OP was mortified that it was said at all.
tonijulie 20
I love fml's that literally make me laugh out loud :)
Zedd_fml 8
Red Forman's catchphrase comes to mind,while reading the FML.
Obey_StudBoii 23
Lmfao I do the same thing with my nephew. I've gotten into the habit of saying "that's what she said" when someone says something awkward
GuinnessGirrrl 8
So... Did you get a raise or promotion afterwards?
Selphis 20
You really need to stop using the internet... it's not healthy!
CharresBarkrey 16
Except that this is from a TV show.
ICastillo 25
Well actually it came from YouTube where the song became famous. Then it was used in South Park and also in Tosh.O. Still it's funny as hell though.
CharresBarkrey 16
That's true, but I've always associated it with South Park more ever since they bought the rights, just because I am a huge South Park fan.
SexyQueen0905 24
If going on the internet is so unhealthy, how did you post your comment? And #33 I always associate it with South Park too. I couldn't stop laughing, especially when Butters was dressed at as flower.
Selphis 20
Maybe I should've said that too much internet is unhealthy ;) and #28 I saw it first on South Park too, but if I said that, I would get someone else saying it's a youtube video...
mustachemonster 7
He says on the Internet
ICastillo 25
I'm not going to lie, I saw it first on South Park too. Then looked up the video online. They're both freaking hilarious.
Link5794 18
There's no such thing as too much Internet.
StaleMATE_fml 7
Should of followed up with the rest of the chorus
CharresBarkrey 16
"You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?" Yeah, that would save him the embarrassment.
SexyQueen0905 24
should have *retreats back into cave*
Kayla860 8
This made my day
KingCeltic77 18
If he writes you up, you should say "Screw you guys! I'm going home!"