Today, campus security called me to let me know a lawnmower crashed into my car. Apparently the guy mowing the lawn lost control. My car wasn't parked by any grass. I need a new bumper. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, campus security called to inform me that my car had been in an accident. I rushed down to the security office to find most of the officers laughing. A portable john blew over on to my car and smashed my rear window. Now, security calls me "Port-A-Potty Guy," and my car smells like shit. FML
Today, I hit a car while trying to park. Assuming that no one saw, I moved my car and parked somewhere else. Hours later I get a call from the university police. While backing up to go to the police station I hit another car. FML
Today, I dropped my car off at the dealership for a bumper replacement due to a hit and run in a parking lot. After being told it was ready, their shuttle picked me up, and backed up into my just-replaced bumper. FML
Today, I was stoked to show my new car to my friends that I pulled into the parking lot a bit too fast, attempting to look cool. I accidentally hit the curb and ended up scratching the entire front bumper on a trash can that I didn't see. Now I have a busted up bumper, and my friends will probably never let me forget it. FML
Today, after I arrived at work, somebody crashed into my parked car and left a big dent. The impact pushed my car up onto the curb and I got a parking ticket. FML
Today, my car alarm went off so I went outside to investigate. Apparently, the abundant rain water in my street had swept a trash can five houses down, only to be stopped by my car. My bumper was dented by a run-away waste receptacle. FML
Today, someone backed straight into my car as I was hunting for a parking spot. I just got my car back from the body shop after a hit-and-run. FML
Today, some guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me for "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML
Today, I went to Walmart to pick up some groceries. When I came out, the front end of my car was crushed in. On the window was a note only saying "Sorry I bumped into your car." FML
Today, I was driving around a parking lot, looking for an empty spot. Someone was backing out a bit too quickly as I was about to pass by, so I honked to announce myself. The driver instead panicked and reversed into my front bumper. FML
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Top comments
Kyzahhh 7
I hate losing control at 5mph and crashing into cars while on my lawnmower
techweed 12
That bastard should pay for it
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Comments (65)
Wheredidgrungego 12
Warning: retarded lawnmower drivers in mirror may be more hazardous than they appear.
itsame0987 18
Thank you! I needed a good laugh
77777771 12
He prob did it on purpose
77777771 12
He prob did it on purpose
Tiz88 0
Idiot....isn't it clear to you, he did!
perdix 31
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there ... with a keg, a bag of weed and a bunch of pre-paid hookers. I saw that one on YouPorn ... I got a good driver discount and a serviceable boner.
upyourzlolz 11
Please. State farm jokes are getting old.
castrosabeast 7
Man that sucks I hope you aren't going to have to CUT into your savings.
batman_516 9
Dad jokes FTW!!!
absolutegrrr 7
I don't understand why CUT is in capitals?
rae_munchkin 6
Shouldn't they have to pay to fix it? That's awful!
XKXKKXK 10
Hey, asphalt gets an itch every once in a while too.
yourkindacool18 5
Admit it. We all thumb our own comments.
j3ebrules 13
Oooh. I wonder if the place has to pay for it. I really hope you don't have to pay a huge deductible or get an insurance hike because of that dumbass.
jas78cool 0
You should get the guy to pay for the bumper