Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a terrible nightmare involving zombies slashing and eating at my face. I woke up in terror and urine, and found the slashing was very real: it was my cat pawing my face for me to feed him. FML
Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away, and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML
Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
Today, my boyfriend is completely obsessed with zombie and horror movies. I don’t care what he watches, the only problem is the big wuss has horrible thrashing nightmares. Last night he thrashed so hard, he elbowed me in the face. I have a big swollen purple knot right on my forehead. FML
Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML
Today, I woke up with a headache. My girlfriend said it might be from the night before, explaining she punched me while I was sleeping because I was snoring in her ear, and she dreamed a bee was attacking her. I'm not sure if I'm more concerned that she punched me, or that it didn't wake me. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, I had a dream in which I was arguing with my mom. In the dream, she threatened to hit me, and I told her I'd do it myself. I reared back and knocked the crap out of myself. I'm awake now, and my jaw still hurts. FML
Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML
Today, my dad came home drunk at four in the morning. He walked into my room, screaming at me to wake up so he can kill zombies. FML
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Top comments
ananamoose 0
keep fighting til death... that's my advice next time don't wake up, if you wake up the zombies win!!!! Dont let them win!!!!
Intoxicunt 6
If you bust your own nose while fighting, I wouldn't suggest taking the zombies on anytime soon.
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Comments (128)
MpeG_ 0
hahahahahahahahahaha
Kiwi_Splash 0
That's really dangerous. It seems you don't have REM paralysis or the dream was very violent. Please take care because that can cause you many future problems with adventurous dreams. Especially that the lack of REM paralysis allows you to act out your dreams. Be careful with this situation.
Duckasaurus 0
Yeah. I was thinking the exact same. I've only had this happen once in my life. It was pretty scary, because I was dreaming I was on a building and I jumped, and I woke up mid-fall, and I was standing up, falling backwards, and hit my head on the wall. It happened in early childhood, where the brain doesn't have it REM paralysis developed enough. If the OP is older, I would see a doctor. Or, it's fake.
flyingpan8 0
bullshit. go **** your ***** mom fir posting such a lame an fake fml.
eddy7 0
someone plays to much ps2...
blackdog218 0
If you had actually read all of the FML you would have realized she was watching a movie, not playing a zombie videogame.
average_girl 0
@15 what duz a ps2 have 2 do w/ anything??? she was watching a movie... -_-
xXMudkipNoobXx 7
no such thing as too much ps2 or ps3.
BioProject 0
I wonder what she did in her sleep after she saw 'Thriller'?
Intoxicunt 6
Or a porno. Sounds like an embarrassing problem.
uSuck 0
LOL!!
BWC1234 0
i think u lost the zombies won
ManicGypsy 22
What movie was it? And why would you beat yourself up? Are you a zombie???
repyourcliche 0
How do you not wake up when you punch yourself in the head? And also it's a good thing it wasn't your dad standing over you otherwise that would've been a pretty awkward conversation...
Clairina 0
cause its this thriller thriller night, and no ones gonna save you from the beast about to strike!
anneboleyn 0
My cousin once had a dream that she was playing soccer and then whacked her foot into a dresser drawer. I once had a dream that I was trying to get a spider off me in bed and woke myself up from banging against the wall. I hate when stuff like that happens.