cauteriseme
United Kingdom
Today, as the clock struck twelve for the new year, I was in the bathroom having a nosebleed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Discipl
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Waterloo, Canada
Eat more fibre
Today, I strained so hard while on the toilet that I gave myself a nosebleed. FML
Anonymous
Dover, United States
Inconvenienced
Today, I got a nosebleed. For 7 hours. I ended up in the ER. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Rough patch
Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML
Anonymous
United States
Leaking from everywhere
Today, I woke up bleeding from every orifice in my body. I've got a nose bleed from my medication, my gums bled when I brushed my teeth, I'm on my period, and I have hemorrhoids. FML
jack the ripped
United States
Today, while examining my busted nose in the mirror, I had a sneeze attack. Now it looks like someone got their throat slashed in my bathroom. FML
MarchingNightmare
Hendersonville, United States
Today, I have had 4 nosebleeds. Four of them, full-on, almost passing out nosebleeds. It's only noon. I think I need to see a doctor. FML
Trent
United States
Deviated septum blues
Today, I had a nosebleed at work after having recent surgery. As I was walking to the bathroom, I tripped and fell, sending blood splattering everywhere. My manager, who was walking by, looked at me and said, “You’re really committed to the bit.” I was too embarrassed to respond. FML
Bleach dat Blood
Panic!
Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML
someone something
Acton, United States
Life is just great
Today, I was taking a shower. Having epilepsy, I seized, tripped over the edge of the tub, and smashed my face against an open toilet, breaking my nose. FML
Ella
United States
Today, I went on a 7-hour plane flight. For 3 hours I had a bloody nose. When it finally stopped, I sneezed. It started to bleed again. FML
Top comments
Primus_fml 0
"Get out of the bathroom, you've been in there since last year!"
kweenbitch 0
lay off the blow for a bit.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (96)
jordanjr 0
catherine were u from
alice490 0
how is that fml?
jermaine5150 0
your life sucks, because you're dumb enough to think this is actually a big deal.
gregomania_fml 0
i was asleep.
DocBastard 40
While I'm sure Catherine is composing a haiku praising your incredible grammar and spelling skills at this very moment, please keep your flirting to private messages. Alternately, you can always try your local strip club. I'm sure you'll have just as much success picking up a girl there as here. Best of luck.
coco9875 0
ha when the clock striked 12 some hot guy in boxers knocked on the wrong hotel door. LOL
kcoolbeans94 7
I have 3+ nosebleeds a day. You've got to learn to go with the flow. (pun intended) heh heh
Mikeers 0
haha well I was spreading peanut butter on a mouse trap at my friends house :)
ifeelfckd 0
Grow up baby.
ThatLooksSticky 16
"Having a nosebleed" is a wacky British euphemism for sex, right?