Today, as I was doing my make-up, I needed a Q-tip to fix a mistake. I took one out the box and put it in my mouth to get it wet. Too bad someone had used it before to clean their ears. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at my aunt and uncle's house. I went to the bathroom and after I washed my hands, I took a Q-tip out of the carton to clean my ears. When I reached for a second one, I noticed that every Q-tip in the carton was actually already used. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML
Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML
Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML
Today, I was talking to myself and got distracted when I was going to put chapstick on my lips. I took the cap off my deodorant and put it on my lips. FML
Today, I saw some reddish-colored stuff on my finger after wiping my face. I thought it was blood at first, so I smelled it, then licked it, I don't know why the fuck I did that but anyways, I later realized I'd wiped off some of my eyeshadow and frickin ate it. FML
Today, while brushing my teeth, I applied the toothpaste to my toothbrush when a few bristles got caught on the lip of the tube and flung a glob of toothpaste into my eye. My eye is now bloodshot, but at least it's minty fresh. FML
Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror, I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly leaned in towards the mirror to pop the pimple, meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML
Today, while undergoing the cumbersome task of screwing the tiny silver ball onto my lip piercing, I clumsily dropped it onto the counter and watched it bounce into the trash can, where it nestled snugly into a used maxi pad. FML
Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML
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Top comments
AgentSkyeBarnes 16
I don't understand why someone would put a used q-tip back in the box. Ew.
jentrynicole 20
Why on earth would they put it back in the box? FYL
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Comments (49)
Bravewolf 15
that's awful, I hope you washed your mouth out
AgentSkyeBarnes 16
I don't understand why someone would put a used q-tip back in the box. Ew.
football98_fml 20
I was eating my cereal while reading this and honestly I just completely lost my appetite. That is horrifyingly disgusting
yerawizardlizzy 27
Why would anyone put one in their mouth? That's what the faucet is for
warped_executive 16
Saliva can provide better uses that water at times, also it's your own body of you think your saliva is gross you should probably clean your mouth. Saliva is good for getting makeup off in all honesty. And sometimes the faucet can be too harsh and drench the q tip.
goaliestud30 23
So why didn't you just use the sink to get it wet in the first place confuses me
itsalanis 25
Because one usually expects Q-tips from the box to be clean.
GoldenOP 15
Also your saliva is a solvent that can get makeup off easier than water
ImTheAlpha 30
My lipstick comes off better from licking my lips than from rubbing with a water-wet (probably a better term but I just woke up and can't word right now) paper towel so I can see why op would use saliva.
JustSomeBroad 24
"Water-wet paper towel" made me think of someone stuffing a paper towel in their mouth to get it wet because for some reason they didn't want to use the faucet.
jentrynicole 20
Why on earth would they put it back in the box? FYL
Googolman 29
Either way, I still think it would be a bit disgusting to smear your saliva on your face.
Bravewolf 15
it's not going to kill you, a lot better than someone else's earwax in your mouth.
mariri9206 32
It's not someone else's saliva - it's your own saliva - and it works, like, 20 times better than water.
deminchic 22
Usually, you wash your face afterwards. It's just easier to get it off with spit.
crudeandrudeguy 29
Talk about a party foul. Who does that?!?!
krazy789 28
People who do that are disgusting. Would you put your dirty clothes with your clean ones?
ChristianH39 30
It would be truly horrifying if OP lived alone.
RabbitOfAurora 28
Who the hell is the grot-bag in your family that did that? Probably best to keep a stash of your own from now on OP!
MidnaLink 35
Grot-bag, I like that one!
vikky538 29
Someone recycled it too soon.
clickme 17
Bet that was an EERIE sensation.
itsalanis 25
It was almost good until the unneeded emphasis. Good try though.