Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I crossed the street, I almost died because of a careless driver, but when I crossed it again on my way back, I got hit by a bicycle. FML
Today, I almost got run over on my bike by a truck who raced through a red light. After narrowly avoiding a collision, the car slowed down. Instead of apologizing for almost killing me, the driver stuck his head out of the window and yelled, "Nice ass!" FML
Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, a guy drove straight into an intersection, running a stop sign and narrowly missing my car. I had to swerve into a snow bank to avoid him. He stopped long enough to see that I had a toddler in my car, before flipping me off and driving away. FML
Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of water, a car pulled onto the sidewalk and bumped into me. Not just any car; my dad's car. He then drove away. FML
Today, trying to be a good role model for the kids behind me, I stopped and thoroughly checked both sides of the road before crossing. I still managed to get hit by a car. FML
Today, on the way home from a night out, I crossed the main road in my town via the traffic lights. As I got to the other side, a guy turned to his two friends and 'whispered' with a look of disgust, "I would've run that one over." Thanks. FML
Today, I was walking my son to school. After yelling at him for not looking where he's walking, I grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to me. Not paying attention, I walked him right into a light pole. FML
Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML
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Top comments
Cloudberry 10
Holy crap that is very dangerous and very illegal. I hope you got his plate number!
imp4ct 15
Wow. That father deserves some punches in the balls, just to be sure he doesn't get any more kids.
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Comments (159)
THE_A_TEEN 28
Someday, that so-called "father" will get his. I honestly hope he crashes his car and catches fire one of these days, without the kid inside of course.
testestestes123 4
Hope in one hand and take a dump in the other. See which one fills up first
THE_A_TEEN 28
Sorry, I rather shit in a public toilet while singing "I need to take a shit, Take a shit" while the other guy in the next stall is having a sensuous wank.
testestestes123 4
Why do you want the guy in the next stall to be having a sensuous wank? I guess there's a fetish for everyone out there
THE_A_TEEN 28
*WHOOSH* Hear that? That's an FML reference going going by your head.
br0ccoli 15
Stupidity has procreated. Time to stock up on canned goods and pee filtration devices. It's a sign that rapture is close.
JoeLouisBomber 9
Wow thats actually ****** up. Dads laughing at his kid for almost killing an innocent person and possibly himself and his child
mufc4everch 2
Indeed, perhaps he should be locked up.
testestestes123 4
Maybe that wasn't his father. Sounds like a pedophile and the kid was trying to get help. Way to only think of yourself.
THE_A_TEEN 28
But, we don't know their side of the story, and we'll never know. I honestly doubt a little kid would be on someone's lap steering the wheel while the drive is laughing like a maniac, that would attract attention. ...and besides, this is OP's FML. It's always about themselves.
testestestes123 4
Actually I do know. That little boy was me. That pervert had his disco stick in my bung. It hurt and I was hoping if I T-boned that car, that Giggles McCrackens disco stick would become dislodged.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Cool story, bro! When's the next story? I was promised some stories.
kalbrek009 20
Car? OP was WALKING! Also, small town, (if it had actually been a pedo, the whole town would have lynched his ass). If I could slap stupid people through the Internet, you'd be first in line! Lol
agalaz 5
dumbass it didnt happen like that
perdix 31
Considering that the Caps knocked out the Bruins last night, why do you have the will to live?
l23VIVE 17
Im sorry bro, but my team the Pens got knocked out by the Flyers... The FLYERS!!!!
challan 19
Wow, what a surprise a whiny Pens fan. Oh crap... Perhaps we are actually chatting with the ultimate cry baby... Crosby himself!!!
perdix 31
I don't know #53, but WHEN the Caps knock out the Flyers, promise me you won't throw yourself in front of a car driven by a baby. That E-Trade baby is a prick, he'll mash the pedal to nail you.
t765234 10
Panthers all the way... Out of the play-offs, that is. I hate being a Florida sports fan.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Trolldad Driver's Ed in session.
Pandacupcakelove 26
Nah, he wasn't a troll... Just an idiot.
Zomg_Okay 27
You mean there's a difference? :o
kirrra 11
With that sort of parenting, I really hope I never have to meet the adult that child will become!
immaMonsta 8
What the hell did I just read...? The father actually thought it was funny that he not only ran a red light (and yes, I'm holding the father accountable even though the kid was steering), but he almost ran you over and could've possibility severely injured/killed you?! That's not funny. I hope you got his plate number so you can report him, or that the intersection had cameras up to catch him in the act.
kirrra 11
testestestes123, I wouldn't know from personal experience, but I'm pretty sure when carrying out unspeakable acts, the first thing running through a pedophiles mind is NOT how to attract the most amount of attention from police as possible!
mhopper 13
This is why Massachusetts has the worst drivers in the nation!!!!
immaMonsta 8
I think New York, New Jersey, and Maryland drivers are all worse than that. I haven't been back to Massachusetts in years though, so I haven't seen their driving lately.
Michael_92 20
I think bad drivers are all over the place, just not a few states.
mhopper 13
There was an actual poll conducted on this. Massachusetts was #1 followed by New York and New Jersey. I've lived in all three and I can agree with that order lol