Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML
Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs TV room. Just as he was about to come, I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door right as he came. I didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML
Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
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Top comments
RougeRamirez 8
Apparently your mouth
gideeupp 9
Lol not quite Daddy's little angel anymore.
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Comments (218)
thathipsterchick 2
Why just why would you have sex if your dad was in the same home 0_o? I mean, I understand if you had no clue because they had left earlier and stuff, but if you knew, YDI :|
badactor009 0
Not exactly what every Dad wants to hear coming from his daughters mouth. But he already knew you are a three holer, right? If he didn't, he does now. At least you only had one guy with you. You can spring that on Mom and Pops another time.
Grauncho 27
Today, I greeted my daughter's boyfriend while he was drinking some water and started for the stairs when I suddenly heard, "Damn, babe. I'm covered in cum. Was there a hole you didn't fill?" It was my daughter. FML
ma77 9
How is that something to jokingly shout out? He knows where he came.
benmec 18
Then you should yell, hey dad are you proud of me? And then give dad a little wink!
Colecto_fml 26
I don't think I've ever seen a more disturbing comment on FML o.O
zandalee 20
Keep looking. There are lots here.
legal371 5
Yeeeep. This place is filled with em
acetheone 8
might have saved yourself the trouble by just showing him the footage. YDI.
DjeePee 25
You know, I have nothing against having sex in the same house as your parents, since a young couple can't easily afford a place of their own. But the keyword here is dignity, aka, be quiet. You missed that one.
ForTheRavers 11
Tramp
ForTheRavers 11
Sorry FML! Not the way a nice young lady would behave, perhaps,
aimeesea75 16
...at least it wasn't breakup sex..?
Snake867 1
The FML should be: As I walked upstairs to my room after a long day at work, I heard my daughter shout, "damn babe, I'm covered in cum, you filled every hole!"