Today after flying 9+ hours to meet my future month in-law, I had to take a pee in the rubbish bucket from her car in front of her, I said in my very bad Japanese, “So I guess we are good friends now!” She responded with a confident, “Yes!” FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my best friend and I came home from Japan. Her boyfriend and I have been having an affair before I left so I decided not to tell him she was coming with me. We just got off the plane and got a bite to eat, he was waiting for me so he could propose, my best friend was standing next to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I enjoyed a lovely shower together. It was indeed lovely until her father came into the washroom to say “Welcome to the family!” whilst taking a giant shit. FML
Today, I got a ride in a friend's car. As I sat down, her younger brother started laughing hysterically from the backseat. In between giggles, he admitted he peed there a few minutes ago. FML
Today, I met a girl at an airport before an early flight, after I’d only had 3 hours sleep. She moved here for a job in radiology. We joked, laughed, flirted, and parted ways. I told my friend, who asked why I hadn't get her number. I joked I would’ve if she'd been a doctor. He then says, “Radiologists ARE doctors, duh!” FML
Today, I was with my grandma in my new car. She suddenly says, "I've got to pee bad." Without giving me enough time to find a gas station, she blurts out, "Never mind, I just did." FML
Today, I was driving my car when I suddenly got diarrhea and shat my pants. I put a plastic bag under me to not let all the shit go through my pants and get to my seat. Then one of my workmates saw my car and came to say hello. She saw all the shit and the plastic bag. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
Today, I had to use my friend's toilet. His pretty cute sister was in the kitchen adjoining the bathroom, so I smiled and said hi on my way through. I then had the loudest and most vile-sounding shit of my life. FML
Today, on the train, a cute girl gave me her number. After maybe half an hour, she went to her seat and I went to the toilet for a quick but loud and painful dump. I opened the door and saw her outside getting bitch-slapped by the smell. FML
Today, I was leaving the car wash when I saw my friend walking on the sidewalk. I pulled over next to her and asked if she wanted a ride. Only after getting a face full of the soda she was drinking did I realize I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
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Top comments
pins91 27
No seriously, is anyone moderating these?! Wtf?
Agent JPN 9
The quality of FML has been going downhill in order to fill post counts. I mean, how is this a FML? You just bonded with your Future MIL. I really cannot see how this could be a FML..... well unless she answered with a confident "NO"
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Comments (14)
KingAdrock 16
Not only do planes and airports have restrooms, but why exactly did she have to WATCH you piss into a bucket?