Today, after carefully, and might I say, expertly removing all the hair from my girlfriend's genitals, she decided to try and "Nair" my balls. 24 hours later and I still can't walk properly and my balls look like they were involved in a severe kitchen incident. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm aging, so it’s clear my ball skin has got more rough, and I can't even shave anymore without bad razor burn. Well, I tried Nair for the first time. My balls are now severely chemically burned and blistered. It was just 4 minutes of Nair! I was finally getting my sex drive back after a divorce, so I was trying to be ready just in case. FML
Today, I decided to shave my balls. When I was finished, I vacuumed up the mess on the carpet, and then the fragments of hair still on my balls. Very bad idea. FML
Today, as I was bent over drying my legs after a shower, my girlfriend snuck behind me and pulled a hair off my ballsack for absolutely no good reason. FML
Today, while I was shaving my nether regions, my trimmer slipped and ate a chunk out of my balls, right beside a vein. I've been bleeding on and off for an hour, and the New Skin I tried isn't able to dry quickly enough. FML
Today, I tried waxing for the first time. At first it felt like I'd dipped my balls in a furnace. Now I can't even feel them. FML
Today, due to a combination of boredom and a faulty hair dryer, I now have singed pubes and burned balls. FML
Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML
Today, I got an allergic reaction to Nair. It was so bad I had to have my girlfriend take me to the hospital at 2am. Where was the allergic reaction? On my nuts. FML
Today, I tried to manscape with some Nair. Nothing helps the pain. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I saw each other naked for the first time. She said my balls looked like little acorns. FML
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Top comments
9a_1z 12
I thought everyone had read that amusing amazon review from the guy who nair-ed his balls. I believe it ended with 'DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS.'. The internet is trying to help you man.
Redoxx_fml 22
Just what kind of kitchen accidents do you get into?
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Comments (86)
HrothgarXII 21
A valuable life experience.
farozzz 7
Didn't you read the instructions ?
trucker2 33
Men think they know everything,
Mike592 18
Except that it was his girlfriend that did it XD
Selene1090 26
I've used nair before and followed the directions carefully and still got really bad burns. And I don't have sensitive skin, nor was I allergic to any of the ingredients.
shay_serendipity 29
Bit of a backfire in your statement there, 25
farozzz 7
Except you don't apply it on sensitive areas like balls ..
SneakySlayer 15
Your missing one word there my GIRLFRIEND decided to nair
Misskreher 30
they make Nair for "down there"
Headcrab 29
Well that's one more thing off the bucket list...
9a_1z 12
I thought everyone had read that amusing amazon review from the guy who nair-ed his balls. I believe it ended with 'DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS.'. The internet is trying to help you man.
Mike592 18
Do you have a link?
Stooby61 18
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/reviews/B000KKNQBK
weswheatley 14
You, my friend are what they call a saint
Redoxx_fml 22
Just what kind of kitchen accidents do you get into?
derangedplanet 23
I'm thinking that's far too innocent for this deal.
redrain567 16
Just be ballsy and stick through it, OP.
worldclassrager 41
Just skip the balls or use scissors...you learned that that hard way..
texaskitty86 25
That sucks but you also deserve it. The instructions for Nair clearly say NOT to use it there.
whynotbliss 18
Only three reasons to nair ones balls, love, vanity, and a dare... Lesson learned, for you and the readers! Some icy hot would have helped soothe the injury ?. Cooking accident?! Don't cook bacon naked is a great rule. Learn that! I reiterate to the readers and you, read directions before plopping substances on ones genitals... It helps save FMLs.
sstahpp 33
If less people Naired their balls imagine how bored we'd be. There would be nothing to laugh at and make us feel better about our lives.
Grayness_ 26
Maybe you left it on for too long or you're allergic to a certain chemical they use. I never have a problem with Nair lol. Feel better tho.