Today, after a long day, I energetically took off my belt to take my pants off and relax. In doing so, I whipped the belt around in the air, causing it to spin around and slap me right in my tender ballsack. I almost threw up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out how it feels to get your nut-sack caught in a belt buckle. FML
Today, I accidentally slapped myself in the face with my belt when I pulled it from my belt loops too quickly. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, I was taking my phone out of my pocket when it caught on the fabric and began to fall. I managed to catch it, but also smacked myself in the balls in the process. FML
Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML
Today, I came down hard on the top bar of my bike, and crunched my balls. I felt sick almost immediately, and by the time I got home I was still nauseous, tender, uncomfortable, and very relieved to finally be able to rest with an ice pack. FML
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
Today, in aerobics, while stretching, my friend leaned over to pull the long hair off my pants. It was my pubic hair sticking through my pants, and I screamed. FML
Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML
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Top comments
sheaboy121 6
Now if your kids are messed up you know why
JosephKorso 15
Did you proceed to watch The Nutcracker?
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Comments (79)
OtakuOfTheEast 14
Hopefully you didn't cause anything worse than pain. You may want to get that checked out, Op.
DomsterDC 16
I'm a girl so I have no idea what that feels like but I'm sure it hurts like hell. Feel better OP!
swenny_xoxo 18
I'm a girl too so I don't know what it feels like either but it hurts the same as being punched in the boob
RoyalMGN 8
well it is a organ so it hurts a lot... my friend kicked me in mine because he jumped in my direction and I collapsed on the ground in pain dying slowly I did throw up and it took a good 40 minutes of my friend saying it will be ok that I could sit up not stand but sit I did heal... but it was painful
InfiniteSunshine 32
Based on the agony I've seen guys in when they gets hit there, I'm pretty sure it hurts a lot more than getting punched in the boob.
Mynamewontfi 40
#5 What a way to contradict your own comment. First not knowing what it feels like then saying it hurts the same as punching a boob. Anyway, I'm not sure what it feels like either, but I think getting hit in the balls hurts more.
RoyalMGN 8
sadly yes... it can take up to a hour for those types of pains to stop
CheekyRaccoon 27
An accurate feeling to be hit on the balls would be like getting your ovaries hit, rather than being hit on the tit. However I don't have any experience with being hit on the chest with female breasts. The most accurate description of having your balls hit would be like being punched in the gut making you want to throw up while having excruciating pain between your legs, which can leave you curled up in the fetal position on the floor.
Calingaladha 21
You've never been hit in the crotch? Still hurts a shitton if you're a girl.
BananEnigma 24
I've been kicked in the clit and I swear to god I couldn't get up off the floor for almost 30 minutes.
pladimir_vutin 5
#5 are you Transgender? wtf
ThatHorse 15
Yeah. Being kicked between the legs as a girl hurts about as much as being kicked in the balls as a boy. However, women are more likely to receive broken pelvic bones from being kicked between the legs than men are. So overall, it sucks a lot more to be kicked between the legs as a woman than it does as a man.
countryb_cth 38
The reason it hurts more for a guy to be kicked in the crotch is that they have a lesser pain tolerance than women. Plus women are used to being in pain down there from period cramps. However, no matter what sex someone is it still hurts to be kicked in the crotch.
ThatHorse 15
It's not a lesser pain tolerance #30. Men have a natural instinct embedded into them genetically to protect their reproductive organs. Because of this instinct, they over-react a bit (but with good reason) when getting kicked in the crotch. It actually doesn't hurt as much as the reaction would suggest it does.
doodycakes 16
Pretty sure that has nothing to do with it #30. Guys have a lesser pain tolerance sure, but it's because there are so many nerve endings on testicles. Which makes them super sensitive to even the slight blow.
JusTheo 17
It's like having two kidneys just hanging out of your body exposed in a sack.
COSaikou 7
no....no...it really isnt.
cj134 4
No it's nothing like Bing hit in the boob it's an organ it is much more sensitive than a boob
cj134 4
No once again bone skin and fat Are no where near as sensitive as organs if you want to get an idea of what it would feel like take a solid liver shot
DoomedGemini 38
A straight shot to the crotch hurts, but I wouldn't say as much as a nut shot. Would a clit hit like someone else mentioned be similar, considering it's so sensitive? Still, we're lucky considering it's harder to hit than a guys balls.
Bluedy 17
I dunno how it hurts when you get punched in the boob, but if you a have nutsack, EVEN THE SLIGHTEST PINCH will give you the mother of all pains for a few seconds.
kelzo33 7
Much worse, there's a metric shit ton of nerve endings in the scrotum
sheaboy121 6
Now if your kids are messed up you know why
JosephKorso 15
Did you proceed to watch The Nutcracker?
junjunbun 28
well that joke was a hit below the belt. :P
Sansational_ 18
Things are semen grim...
MasterTron 24
Casino Royal anyone?
Sandsh8rk 36
I guess that's one way to practice your sackwhacking skills...
Miss_Whipped 43
I was thinking along the lines of Hacky Sack, but that's just me.
allforfun 23
Dude I'm almost 40 and have never heard of sack whacking. In fact, I'm 100% confident that if I google it, the only result will be your post.
dilliedill 13
I bet it threw you for a loop.... I shouldn't be making a joke, and a horrible one at that. Feel better OP!
SaxSolo 5
RIP ;-;
RumpPlug 4
Your future kids went to Mars for sure. R.I.P Op juniors.
RoyalMGN 8
well you got your pants off.... and in the process almost destroying your family jewls
PoolDeadio 12
That would've been hilarious to watch! Hope your jewels feel better.