Today, after 2 months of searching, I finally found a good, stable job. How does the universe reward me upon waking up on my very first day? With a burning yeast infection. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I have a job interview after months of struggling to find work. I also woke up with explosive diarrhea and can’t be away from the toilet for more than 10 minutes. FML
Today, after months of searching and several emotional breakdowns, I finally found a new job. My wife's words of encouragement? "Try not to fuck this one up." FML
Today, after months of unemployment, I finally started at a new job. The building burnt down on my very first shift. FML
Today, after two rounds of antibiotics, I got a yeast infection. My husband started calling me "Yeasty." FML
Today, my life finally seemed to be getting on track after recovering from major depression, paying off most of my debt, and scoring an amazing job. And then I woke up. FML
Today, I psyched myself up and headed out to a really promising job interview. I was sure I was going to nail it and get my first job. That is, until a bird shat on my head on my way there. Thank you so very much, universe. FML
Today, it was my two-week anniversary of starting my new job, after over a year of unemployment due to Covid. It was great, I was getting on with people, and it actually felt like a career where my skillset was valued and I was appreciated by the management. I showed up to work this morning to find it had burned down. FML
Today, after supporting my man during his year of unemployment and job searching, he came home from his first week at his new job. He brought me a little gift: The flu, courtesy of his new workplace. FML
Today, I finally got a job after nearly two years of unemployment. My boss is amazing, my coworkers are fun and helpful, and the pay is great. There's just one issue: it seems as though nothing can change the fact that I simply do not enjoy the job itself, even though I really thought I would. FML
Today, after spending thousands of dollars and several years pursuing a higher education so I could get a high paying job doing something that requires skill and brainpower, I finally got my first job offer after months of searching. I will be cleaning houses. FML
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Top comments
leafeon523 20
Maybe the universe is just burning to see you succeed!
gosh_mate 30
That's just a small stumble, at least you've now better set-up for the long term!!
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Comments (64)
maggiefox 25
Well at least it'll go away, and hopefully your job won't :)
beeferjay 34
Pay attention to the cooter. It was probably giving you clues for days...
cosmicdancer84 7
would you rather be unemployed and with a yeast infection?
knaevery 17
Wow 2 whole months. This is sarcasm.
Hildy93 21
Ew did you really need to tell us that?
teapotrevolt 27
Why are you here, but to read the misfortune that is bestowed onto others? If you want to not read then; don't. But don't complain when you 'mistakenly' read something revolting /tooyou. Lol
Keiraquarium 12
37: Well... the yeast infection is kind of the whole point of the FML. It wouldn't have been much of an FML if OP had just said 'Today, I got a job. Then, I woke up and went to the job. FML.'
Hildy93 21
God I forgot you guys can't tell sarcasm through text.... -_-
mads_fml 7
How exactly does that qualify as, or even imply, sarcasm???
Kristen320 21
That's worst than waking up late!
EvilLittleMan 23
But you did have a burning desire to work again. Yes? No?
MrThump 16
Guys get itchy balls all the time.
Keiraquarium 12
Not the same thing. I wouldn't know what itchy balls feel like but I assume that a 'burning' yeast infection is much worse
bettyc4 26
Clean better.
Steffi 26
People can get them regardless of how clean they are.
Eliiara 11
#48 over cleaning can also cause this.
kellyem2 20
Put half a teaspoon of baking soda in a glass of warm water and chug. It won't cure it, but it'll make the pain and symptoms a lot better. Sorry, OP!