Today, a stranger called me, saying I look hot in the bra I was wearing. When I hung up, thinking it was a joke, I opened the back door, and saw a man running away from my backyard. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought I was home alone so I went to take a shower and left my door open. My dog came in, stole my bra, and ran out of my bathroom. I jumped out and followed him, only to find out that my brother had two of his friends over. They all saw me naked, and my dog had my bra in his mouth. FML
Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML
Today, I heard someone try to get into my back garden. I ran to the front door, opened it, and shouted at whoever it was. I then saw a police officer appear, following the person who'd jumped my fence. I then realised I wasn't wearing any trousers. I'd shouted at the police half naked. FML
Today, I was getting dressed in my bedroom with the blinds open and had nothing covering my top half. I thought my neighbours wouldn't be able to see in through all the trees, that was until I heard someone wolf whistle and one of my neighbours running away. FML
Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML
Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML
Today, somebody poured a cup of coffee down the back of my shirt. When I turned around, I saw a man who said, "You looked like my ex from behind!" and ran off. FML
Today, I went for a run. I noticed a really hot guy mowing his lawn. I ran a couple of laps past him. After a while, when I slowed down, I smiled at him, and he said, "You look really hot." I thanked him, and he quickly replied, "No, I mean you're sweating a lot." FML
Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML
Today, I got a call from the police that my house had been burglarized, but an off-duty cop caught the criminal. I pull up to see my detained, psycho ex-boyfriend sheepishly grinning at me. He had three of my lace panties and two of my bras, claiming it was "all for memories' sake". FML
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Top comments
boating_guy 33
Buy a gun. Dare him to **** with you again.
Fence 8
Aw DAMN. That's creepy as heck.
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Comments (186)
Sarojin 0
That. Is. Terrifying.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Perhaps you should keep your curtains/blinds closed? Then that shouldn't happen. Or at least avoid any possible peepholes in your house if you're going to run around in your undergarments.
EricaJoy 0
The fact that he has your phone number is the creepiest part
jdbaby02 5
You must be hot
jdg_3689 0
im gonna sound like a douchebag redneck for saying this but.....dam im glad to live in texas, that creep wont bother you when you pop a couple rounds in the ground screaming "LEAVE ME THE **** ALONE ASSHOLE!"
pregnantpianist 2
Don't mess with Texas.
Legendslayer222 26
Why is this categorized under 'love'?
Shiiii 1
Holy ****, call the cops.
pregnantpianist 2
Begin purchasing and dispersing firearms throughout your home IMMEDIATELY. I already have. I love my guns.
missfyl 0
get pepper spray and home security FAST!
yenidewi 11
stalker !