Today, a homeless man asked me for money in a train station bathroom. When I told him I had no money he left. He then returned only to pour a bottle full of urine on my head while I was in the stall. I use a metro card. I honestly had no money. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was walking down the street when a homeless man asked me for some spare change. I told him I didn't have any. I then tripped. Not only spilling the soda I was drinking all over myself, but also spilling the spare change I had from buying it. FML
Today, I politely asked a man to not sleep on a tram stop that I had to clean. He got up, and while I leaned forward to pick up some trash from the ground nearby, I felt a warm stream on my back. Now I can't get the smell of urine off my clothes. FML
Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for a sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML
Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML
Today, I was leaving the train station when a man came up to me and asked me if I have an unlimited metrocard to swipe him in. I did have an unlimited card so I told him sure. While taking out my metrocard from my wallet, he grabbed my wallet and ran away as fast as he could. FML
Today, a homeless man started to wet himself in the recliner at the coffee shop where I work. He then walked all the way to the bathroom, only to finish urinating in a puddle right in front of the bathroom door. Guess who cleaned it up. FML
Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Today, after leaving a bar I fell asleep on the Q train heading home. I awoke at 5am in Coney Island, end of the line, to a cop poking me with his baton. He gave me a ticket for "Subway Vagrancy" even though I have a job and an apartment. He didn't ticket the homeless man next to me covered in piss. FML
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
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Top comments
CrassKal 27
I honestly would've punched him.
jordantiner 0
He sounds pissed.. ;)
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Comments (132)
Gunslinger3974 0
Doesn't matter if you had $10,000,000 on you. You said no. No is no. The vast majority of homeless are a bullying criminal element.
coderedninja 6
That's gross, I'm sorry OP.
Leslier_fml 4
You should have told him to go home. Then laugh. Its true they can be mentally unstable, but that would piss anybody off.
bethwoodfin 0
Lol at all the people making piss jokes, but sorry op.
Fricktion 3
"Shocking news: Homeless man was curb stomped Thursday night" He doesn't need the teeth anyways!
kristirhong 12
Oh that's terrible! So sorry.
alwaysbored13 14
And even if you had money, why should you ever feel obliged to give him some? You worked for it, he did not.
StayatHomeSon 9
Shoulda kicked his ass
Ima_NeRD6213 4
****!! That guy's giving us a bad name....
AntonioMontana 0
I would have ****** him up. I work hard for my money and I sure as **** aint UNICEF.