Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out of nowhere a giant bug hit me in the face. I went into instant ninja mode, screaming and flailing. When I stopped, I realized it was just a leaf and everyone was staring at me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML
Today, a bee landed on my leg. I didn't realize it was there until my friend yelled out, "Bee!" kicked me in the leg, and ran off. I fell to the ground screaming and clutching my leg. She missed the bee and it still stung me. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML
Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML
Today, I went for a jog to enjoy the fall weather. I tripped over a tree root and fell face-first into a pile of leaves. As I tried to get up, a bunch of kids had gathered to laugh, and one even shouted something about, “A grown-ass man playing in the leaves!” FML
Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML
Today, while stocking the green beans at work, I picked up a "leaf" which turned out to be a grasshopper. I screamed so loud, my coworkers now think I'm crazy. This is only my second week here. FML
Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML
Today, I was riding to a prom with my friends in the middle of a swamp-covered area. I stuck my head out the top and screamed like they do in the movies. My hair, makeup, and mouth were quickly filled with bugs. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dontpanic_fml 32
Quick tutorial. Ninjas do: Swiftly chop bugs before they can hit face Ninjas don't: Scream and flail
Ambient25 25
Just tell them you were practicing your mosh
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (87)
laden_swallow09 35
25- Phobia or not, it was an overreaction. The very essence of a phobia is to have an irrational fear of something in particular. Irrational fear leads to overreactions. OP overreacted.
AlexxIV 3
Instant ninja mode...screaming? Mate you clearly don't know what ninjas do
DDCA 24
What kind of festival? You probably went into "ninja" mode from all the hallucinogenics you took. At least you showed that leaf.
rubyliu8420 7
FYI ninjas don't scream or flail... YDI for sure.
rubyliu8420 7
Exactly.
tamtam27 15
Dude/dudette, are you scared of bugs or just things that fly in general? I got a friend who is totally scared of anything that flies, even flying leaves
ClaremoreZebra 8
Your friends a pussy.
luckshotpro 12
I'd like to meet a ninja who's go-to tactic was screaming and flailing.
iwadasn 33
Screaming and flailing? I'm not sure you know what a ninja is.
JACKxRAWR 22
#43, I'd generally say it's an overreaction to flip shit when a leaf flies into your face.
Lomus 24
Let's see who gets this: was it the most important leaf in human history?
uhnevermind 24
I wonder if OP is named Clara. That would make my day. XD
Lomus 24
It's at least good to know I'm not the only Whovian on this site...