Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk, saying, "Shut the fuck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML
Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML
Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML
Today, I was singing in the shower and my neighbor called the police because they thought I was in trouble. FML
Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML
Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and left a note that said "Please stop singing in the shower. You're terrible, and everyone in the building can hear you." FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML
Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
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Top comments
Fortuitous 0
That thief stole the shit from the mother in Belgium, too! Everything is linked, kids.
Freeze_fml 17
More people need to receive notes like these.
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Comments (55)
DocBastard 40
This obviously didn't happen in South Africa, where the thieves trip over your cat and leave an apologetic note.
Brandi_Faith 34
Definately not Doc! This thief is not nearly as polite!
QuitetheDuffles 0
it wasn't a robbery, you idiot, it was a burglary. know the difference
largsexy 1
Fag there's no difference douch bag
RosiePatosie 0
Who cares about what the robber thinks? hahah
TheWaterCarrier 0
Haha owned by a thief :P
honey5183 2
liar no thief is going to take the time to write a note
capnbzarr 43
And how would you know?
kalejaxson 5
Next time don't leave your front door open while you're showering. Probably the neighbors heard you and decided to teach you a lesson so they would never have to hear you sing again. And then on their way out, they decided to do a little Christmas shopping.
brianjman14 23
Well that's...just...RUDE!!!
LFAM_fml 0
funny. LoL
narrowords 18
You were burglarized, actually. Does anybody know the difference anymore?
Bawxy 0
Nobody cares anymore...
flirtyfaery 7
Isn't the word "burgled"?
fruityloopz 4
couldn't you get fingerprints taken from the note and find the burglar?