Today, my boss confirmed he is a micro-managing asshole. We walked into the office together and I turned on the lights. He switched them off and switched them on again, just to make sure that I did it right. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, like every day, my boss was complaining about something or other, but this time it was work that I knew he'd done himself, and he still blamed me. FML
Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for leaving on time. After months of management hounding us about our overtime, I get in trouble for doing what I was supposed to do. FML
Today, I started at my new job. Turns out my boss is a complete douchebag. He spent most of the day looking over our shoulders and making cuntish comments about our work, then called a guy a piece of shit for farting, and forced him to spray disinfectant on his chair. FML
Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML
Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, he turned his back on me, so I gave him the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing him with a knife. He was looking in the mirror and saw everything. FML
Today, at work, I was on the toilet for so long the motion lights turned off. I stood up, pants around my ankles and began waving my arms above the stall to get them to turn on again. At that exact moment, my boss walked in. FML
Today, my boss continued to orchestrate behind the scenes with my colleagues to make me look bad for her lack of organization. Then she showed up 10 minutes late to a meeting, shared that she needed a vacation, and realized that she needed to micromanage less. I've been asking her to make that change for months. FML
Today, my boss reprimanded me for a huge screw-up that he was responsible for. FML
Today, we had a surprise party for my boss. Someone turned out all the lights. I was so scared of the dark, the first thing my boss saw when he walked in was all my co-workers watching me scream, "TURN IT ON!" FML
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Top comments
mds9986 24
Hopefully he doesn't follow you into the bathroom to make sure you shake it right.
Tripartita 45
I can sympathize with him. Lights are really hard until you get this one weird trick down: if a light has been properly turned on, you'll notice the bulb in the circuit completed by the switch emitting light.
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Comments (69)
Vanimal 13
Hope you boss doesn't do this for everything you do! Good luck!
crudeandrudeguy 29
He may just have OCD
higgysaurus 18
Is it too much of a stretch to think he was joking?
mds9986 24
Hopefully he doesn't follow you into the bathroom to make sure you shake it right.
Jason89 16
so if OP shakes just once and his boss shakes atleast twice, he's playing with it? lol
liquifiednate 21
No matter how much you shake and wiggle there will always be a dribble
kaybows 14
Taking the definition of boss to a whole new level.
darksoul43 11
These type of people are so annoying. Why hire people in the first place if they would eventually do everything by themselves?
countryb_cth 38
Some may have no control over it if they have anxiety or OCD. It may be annoying to some but they can't help it.
amberthebear 7
I never knew there was a right way to turn on a light.
NeatNit 33
it's called OCD and it is not logic-based
kbecks87 16
#29 you don't know that the boss has OCD, he could just be a jerk
WhoopteDo 26
I'm not sure all the lights are on in his head, maybe flip him on and off again to make sure.
False_Stupidity 42
I'm sure that flipping his boss off would get OP fired.
oiler 21
Damn, hes a new species
ihartmytdi 23
Closet OCD maybe?
FMLusername969 21
OCD? YES! In the closet? NOOOO...
FMLusername969 21
OCD? YES! In the closet? NOOOOOOO...
wellthisisntgood 19
That was my first thought.
Tripartita 45
I can sympathize with him. Lights are really hard until you get this one weird trick down: if a light has been properly turned on, you'll notice the bulb in the circuit completed by the switch emitting light.
UserError94 18
Holy shit, I feel like I've been living in the dark til now
Tripartita 45
Here's another tip: try cooking things in pans instead of just placing or pouring them directly on the stove. It's easier and cleaner, too!
ShyVi 18
I've been cooking wrong all this time.
lexred 30
What if he comes to your home to check if you are doing it correctly with your wife?
philosophicallll 25
Now why would that happen?