Today, I ran into my parents' bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door, my parents were on top of each other, laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my parents like rough sex. I found the whip and handcuffs. FML
Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML
Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML
Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML
Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They kept me locked me for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML
Today, I locked my keys in the house. I panicked so hard and immediately started kicking the door, desperate to get my keys. My boyfriend, who I forgot was staying over, woke up and opened the door right as I kicked it, and the door smashed into his face. FML
Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML
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Top comments
SusanaSaysRawrxD 0
Oh dear. Awkward... What was your reaction? :3 Hopefully it didn't take long to find the keys. I wouldn't want to be in there for long. Or at all, actually.
fxdxhk90 0
Should have taken a few pics for blackmail purposes.
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Comments (138)
someguy945 0
Wait they were both handcuffed? That's not even S+M. That would be like M+M.
Anon17564 3
Handcuffs aren't really sadistic or masochistic - it's the B part of BDSM. Eh, sucks for them to have had to do that, but they carried it pretty well. Sucks for you to have had to help them and to have found this out, yeah, but ultimately it's actually very rare for somebody to be completely vanilla. Good for them that they still have that kinda sexual freedom. It's just it doesn't help with the SHEER HORROR of the situation, I accept. Ick.
nick_beresho 0
Lmfao. That's absolutely hilarious. Awkward but... hilarious
molitov 0
they have safety release buttons.. keys aren't really necessary.. so the trauma u have been thru isn't either...
ryansims 0
what's your moms number????? sounds fun
JellyBeann 0
Niceeeeeeee lmaooo kind of suckss for you but whateverr. i shouldd tryy thatt. ahahaah
screwtaylor 0
Did you get the whip cream also?
lizardlips 1
and you did nothing to extort them a bit...?!?! Yes, FYL!
LordKoin772 0
Wow, fyl... I woulda been like "Nah, I think Imma just head out for awhile, be back in a few hours." =P
Six_and_the_Moon 3
Are you kidding? That's awesome ... totally not an FML. I hereby applaud your parents for having a sense of humour in such a situation and for not being boring as ****. Parents with personalities and who know how to have fun without being awkwardly serious will always win in my books.