Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss came in during my turn, and I got singled out for a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML
Today, a random customer at work admonished my coworker for being on her phone. During our lunch break. As he walked away, my coworker muttered, "What the fuck is his problem?" I nodded in agreement. He heard her and saw me nodding. As did our boss. Time to get written up. FML
Today, at work I was talking to a co-worker about what a slacker my manager was, and how all she did was stand around and talk. She was standing behind me the whole time. I now have sore nuts due to a direct hit from a broom handle. FML
Today, I watched a manager and a co-worker sit underneath a table in our store all day as I got yelled at for not working hard enough. I was the only one actually working. FML
Today, I was on my way to work and someone cut me off. I then switched lanes and sped past the person as I flipped them off. What I didn't notice was that the person that cut me off was my boss. He's been shooting me dirty looks from across the room all morning. FML
Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML
Today, my boss threatened to write me up, after I made a slightly rude joke about a coworker everyone hates. A while later, a colleague told me the same joke. Turns out my boss had gone around telling it to everyone else and taking all the credit. FML
Today, I got a new chair at work. After spending three hours putting it together, I was called into my boss's office and let go. FML
Today, my lazy bastard of a co-worker punched me straight in the jaw because he didn't get the promotion I did. Being his new manager, I fired him. A few hours later, I was fired for "abusing" my power. FML
Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML
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Top comments
Meraki 19
"One thing lead to another," ... I was expecting something sexual after that and facepalmed.
iLike2Teabag 27
I was expecting an FML about hooking up with coworkers when I first read this...
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Comments (70)
Goblin182 27
Way to take one for the team.
mattrd_fml 31
This made me think of the episode of American Dad where Francine got a job at Stan's office and all the guys were pushing her around the office in her swivel chair. lol
Omniprism 15
What an asshat.
JaguarGuy 11
Sorry you missed out on your turn.
squarecircles 13
Re:"one thing led to another". Why can't you all just get your minds out of the gutter?! Seriously.
interesting33 37
he sounds like some teachers.
Florentina 17
Dude...that's life.
hateevryone 15
this is kinda funny....at least you had fun lol.
elenaunlucky 10
lol that happened to me too ,though it ended up with me landing on the floor near the door from my chair.
rybaby23 8
I agree with everyone else. Totally thought that was going in a different direction haha. Sorry OP.