Today, I found out that my gorgeous, smart, perfect new boyfriend has an unusual fetish. It doesn't involve me at all actually. Just a Labrador. This is probably a deal breaker. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML
Today, my funny, handsome, intelligent, caring, all around awesome boyfriend and I broke up. He introduced me to his fetish and wanted me to participate. His fetish? Dressing, talking, and acting like a baby. He wanted us to both wear diapers and pretend to be babies together. Fuck that noise. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted the reason he was dating me was because he has a fetish for grandmothers and apparently I look, smell, and act like one. FML
Today, my boyfriend told his parents about my bondage fetish. In front of me. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend only dates me because I look a bit like his favourite porn star. FML
Today, I found out that my new boyfriend is a "Men's Rights Activist". FML
Today, I realized my boyfriend's dog is more excited to see me than he is. FML
Today, I found out that the love of my life had been pleasuring himself to pictures of my ex-boyfriends. Yes, he's bisexual. He says it's ok because I'm dating him now. Great. FML
Today, when my new boyfriend told me he had a thigh fetish, I thought it was cute, until I realised our sex life would mostly be him fawning all over my legs, then dry humping my knees. We’ve been together 3 months and I can count the number of actual shags I’ve had on one hand. FML
Today, my boyfriend learned about my filthy fetishes in the worst way possible. He found me naked in the bathroom, licking the dirty toilet seat. I couldn't even make an excuse. FML
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Top comments
Mikeskinner 7
Looks like you're... Barking up the wrong tree.
acerima 11
Screw the puns, that is just sick.
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Comments (165)
starw0lf 31
Hide all the Labs in the vicinity, quick!
perdix 31
Probably? Labs are great dogs, but when the word "fetish" is in the same paragraph, you need to get the **** out and not look back. Anyways, a proper fetishist uses Great Danes like ZZ Top recommends.
Keevarou 17
Did they not lie about sharp dressed men's too?
perdix 31
Technically, no, being "sharped-dressed" is necessary, but not sufficient for every girl to be crazy about you. When your "wallet's fat" is when the insanity rate approaches 100%.
yeti37 16
Cuz once you go Black Lab you never go back! (Or so I've heard...)
Zen_Mei 17
Holy fu*k
baseline59 3
That's pretty sick, I'm outta here. If you need me I'll be in my lab.
skyeyez9 25
I am pretty sure that is against the law. Poor dog.....
Keevarou 17
Am I the only one not fussing over this thing..? Several people like different things, some gets a Hardon for dogs/horses/animals, while other do it for their father, sister, uncle, brother. There are some difference between thinking and doing it, people should usually not be judges for things they like or find sexually attractive
DjeePee 25
I agree with you, BUT if your biggest sexual fantasy is to hump a dog, 1) you probably really want to do it - I know I want to fulfill the majority of my sexual fantasies - and 2) you can be fairly certain that this is a huge deal for the partner, emotional (a dog is more arrousing than me) and physical (he has stuck the same penis that is now inside me, in a dog). This IS a deal breaker. OP has the right to be upset.
Keevarou 17
I see, there may be some emotional problems, but to be honest, I would not really care where that dick have been before tbh, but one small fetish like that is not that bad, it would be worse if he forced her to enjoy it with him. And some dogs have something a human usually do not have, unconditional love and such
Pleonasm 36
...
Keevarou 17
I think I broke pleonasm
LColt 7
you wouldnt have a problem if your boyfriend stuck his dick in an animal ?! really?
Keevarou 17
65, why would I have a problem with it? It's his choice, and I got no right to judge him because of that :)
pmadNess 16
"... Would not care where the dick had been before." ... Ever heard of disease? Again, as posted in reply to one of your earlier comments, where is the dog's choice in this? Joke about the subject all you want. Actually contemplating it... Just no.
Keevarou 17
There is a thing called hygiene and protection. And some dogs can actually be trained to perform those stuff, just depends on how you go on about it, it's not just so easy to just putting it in the dog.
LColt 7
if you are dating a person thats ***** helpless animals and you have no problem with it then you both need help. Who knows what kinds of things could be passed from an animal ro a human and vice versa that way...
Enslaved 38
Seriously? And the dog's choice? Do you really think that dog gave consent, and was begging for some guy to stick his penis in him? I really hope you don't feel that way about the pervs attracted to underage children.
SuperDanielNL 23
Who let the dogs out?
Hamz1989 13
That's just wrong on so many levels.
BlueEyes9812 5
Probably?! Probably a deal breaker?!?!
stellasue11 38
haha, probably. ... id say for sure deal breaker.... fer reals!