Today, my daughter and I went to the carnival and had our faces painted. When we returned home hours later, I realized I have a deep sunburn all around my face, except for the skin under the paint in the shape of a gecko. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went our school's football game against their rival team. Before the games started, I got my school's logo painted on my face. After nearly 5 hours of watching the game, I went home to wash the paint off my face, only to find the logo had been sunburned onto my face. FML
Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML
Today, my daughter and I were at a school carnival. At the face painting station, she sat down and asked for a kitty on her face. Next, she shoved me on a chair and whispered something into the lady's ear. I ended up with a 'black eye' by request of my own daughter. She's 4. FML
Today, multiple people admired my elaborate face paint. This happens every Halloween, at least every Halloween since I got badly burnt in a car accident. FML
Today, I went to an amusement park with my family. I was the only one who put on sunblock, and the only one who got a sunburn. FML
Today, my girlfriends and I got a caricature painting while on a trip in the city. Unfortunately for me, the part of my appearance that the artist decided to exaggerate was my acne. FML
Today I got sunburned on my cheeks. This wouldn't be too bad if they were the ones on my face. FML
Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML
Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML
Today, I fell asleep while at an outside birthday party in the sun for a five-year-old. That five-year-old put an animal cracker on my forehead. I now have a rhino-shaped tan line. FML
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Top comments
Barrientos432 5
Sounds like a win to me.
3mi1y_ 16
OMG THAT'S SO COOL! don't complain! :D
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Comments (163)
iBeC00L 0
sounds fancy pancy
moonsfog 0
awesome!!!!!!!!
MadamGeek 0
I'm sorry, but I laughed. This is a genuinely funny FML. lol Best thing to do is make the car insurance jokes. People will get a kick out of you! =D
big_smucker 0
lol well its better than a dick or like a big tiger mask face
cristy91 33
that sounds sexy. I see a promotion coming your way.
lana1316 0
thats soooo cool!!! i want one :)
JustHereBecause 0
ahaha. this actually made me lol.
idkmyusername 0
hahaha, u guys make my day x) OP- dnt worry, just tell all the guys u were playing a kinky sex game with ur ex-boyfriend that included exotic animals and bleach
bigredmonkeybutt 30
And this surprises you why? I bet the untanned gecko looks cool.
bigbadtim 7
LOL Maybe you can get a job advertising for Geico.