Today, I realized that my two year-old likes to help with the groceries. And by help, I mean hide a bag of chicken. It's been two weeks since I went grocery shopping and I still can't find it, but it smells like something died in my house. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, we found out the god-awful smell in our truck was actually coming from the whole uncooked chicken I thought the store forgot to ring up over two weeks ago. It had fallen out of the bag and under the passenger seat. FML
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for the chicken I bought four days ago. I finally found it - not in the refrigerator, not in the freezer, but in the trunk of my car, which now smells like a dead animal. FML
Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML
Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML
Today, I discovered the source of the vile stench in my room. My daughter had "saved" a bird from our cat and put it in a box under my bed, hoping to nurse it back to health. She forgot about it, leaving the corpse rotting in there for who knows how long. FML
Today, my six-year-old daughter organized a treasure hunt… for our cat. She hid the contents of an entire bag of cat food all around the house. FML
Today, my husband gave our three-year-old son a lesson on life and death. He did this by slaughtering our pet chicken for dinner in front of him. My son has been crying for hours. FML
Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML
Today, my toddler thought it would be funny to hide my car keys. After searching for hours, I found them in his toy box. FML
Today, I walked into my apartment after work, only be to greeted by an awful smell. I searched every inch of the place, convinced something had died. After an hour of searching around, I found the source: a single forgotten boiled egg in one of my backpack's pockets. I will never forget the smell of sulphur or whatever it was. FML
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Top comments
Kermy1113 23
This is when discipline comes into place
DeathofCareBear 21
Sniff it out, you can do it.
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Comments (54)
MozillaHostile 21
Well technically, there IS a rotting corpse in your house.
sariberii 8
Seems like you can't control your children... Not that hard to make them tell you where they put it
Vegetarian27 24
That's because you literally have a rotting corpse in your house.
Reinardd 5
A bag... of chicken?? Is this something American I don't understand? I've never heard of buying chicken by the bag.