Today, I was using a restroom with automatic sinks and toilets. I assumed the paper towel dispensers were automatic too. I stood there waving my hands like an idiot before a girl walked in, pulled a lever, and made paper towels come out for me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I used the public restroom at a park. After washing my hands, I went to dry them, only to realize there were no paper towels. I thought the air dryer would work, but it broke halfway through, leaving me standing there, awkwardly fanning my hands with my arms spread wide. A group of teenagers walked in and started laughing at me. FML
Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML
Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML
Today, the stall I was using didn't have any toilet paper in it. Being the immature idiot I am, I was too embarrassed to ask for someone to grab me some. So I waited 45 minutes for the bathroom to be empty and crept into the next stall, only to find it was also out of toilet paper. FML
Today, I tried to quietly leave a public toilet at work without anyone noticing how long I'd been in there. The automatic hand dryer turned on as I walked past, making me jump so hard, I walked straight into the door. FML
Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML
Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML
Today, I had to pee badly. I went into a stall and sat down. Only until after I'd peed, I realized that I didn't have any toilet paper. I waddled to the next stall with my pants down to get more toilet paper, believing that the bathroom was empty. It wasn't. FML
Today, I was shopping in a mall when I needed to go to the bathroom. One of the toilets was out of order, so I went to the other toilet. After that, there was no toilet paper, so when I saw tissue in the sink, I left the stall with my pants down and someone saw me. FML
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Top comments
imaxmain 24
you shouldnt automatically assume things
amirawrx 8
I have to admit, I've done this before. FOL
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Comments (67)
JokerJim2013 14
Classic FML! One of the funniest ones I've read in awhile. This is along the lines of someone writing on a piece of paper and waiting for the squiggly red line to see if they spelled the word correctly.
Jharrist89 12
You're an idiot.
Jharrist89 12
Didn't you see Tropic Thunder?! You never go full Retard!!
HOPPE612 5
what restroom shares BOYS AND GIRLS!!!!!
QueenOrangeSoda 21
A unisex bathroom--but who's to assume OP is a guy? I'm not sure what it said in the FML that made people think that. It's more likely that OP is also female.
my2centsworth 15
See, it was automatic. It just ran on a different type of power.
SlashX19 16
What I'm confused with is why a girl walked because this appears to be written by a guy
tj4234 36
which part 'appears' to be written by a guy?
arsenicalhumor 30
There's no pity for such stupidity.
hobojo69 23
I've done it to your not alone
jennamarbles17 9
(Ass)(u)(me)
isaiaah 6
And this is why technology is far too relied upon nowadays. YDI