Today, I awoke to my cat with micro pellets all over him. He'd destroyed a pillow containing them, and now there are thousands of these pellets throughout the entire house. My vacuum is broken. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, our rodent problem was taken care of. I discovered this when my cat projectile-vomited a soggy, death-scented wad of dark fur and tiny organs onto the couch. FML
Today, I awoke to find a giant turd on my carpet, cat hair everywhere in my room, and a big hole in my window screen. I don't own a cat. FML
Today, I realized I'm missing my diamond earrings. After ripping apart the vacuum bag and exhausting all other options I'm pretty sure my new cat ate them. I'm going to go sift through several days worth of cat shit now. FML
Today, I bought a new beanbag chair. My cat thought it was a great scratcher and I now have thousands of tiny plastic balls around the house. He decided those looked yummy, and now the scent of vomit and plastic is awful. FML
Today, I got home after a spending a week recovery from surgery. My neighbour had been feeding my cat whilst I was away. Exhausted, I went straight to my bedroom where I soon discovered that my cat had shat on my pillows, duvet, and pyjamas. FML
Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML
Today, I got into bed as my cat crept under it. I then heard him gagging, so I instantly got back up to get him out, because my floor is carpeted. As I pulled him into the hall, he flew upwards, made a horrific "Blagh!" sound, projectile vomited everywhere, then hit the wall and ran. FML
Today, my cat attempted to make up for my insomnia with a dead mouse. I have no idea where he got it. FML
Today, I was woken up at 5:15 AM to the lovely sounds of my cat barfing in three different places on my bedroom carpet. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
Bummer. Maybe this means you should buy a new vacuum.
iAmScrubs 19
Make a ball pit with the pellets. Who doesn't love ball pits? I still go to the McDonald's play pen just for the ball pit.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (152)
zombiekitten87 12
You can always rent a vacuum or have it repaired, but I'd be more concerned that your cat probably ate some of the pellets...
YurTriniFantasy 1
If yu start now with that broom you might finish by the end of the week!
HU4L188 0
I love cats
hockey199813 5
Real men
THE_A_TEEN 28
Real men what? Finish your sentence.
i_am_that_one 0
Well u could always pick it up one by one... Either way this is a shitty situation...
muffins650 1
Lame.. I have a broken vacuum too :(
staats_tristan 4
haha loser
RichieChico 0
I'd bet any money it was a Sobakawa pillow. Sooo comfy!
AustinSilar 0
atleast it wasent rat posioning...
rynoguy 0
Use a broom
OfficeNinja 5
your cat just needed fresh litter.