Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML
Today, I was standing by the bed, naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opened the door and walked over to me, swinging her hips, wearing practically nothing. At about four feet from me, she tripped on the edge of the floor mat, and used my junk to catch herself. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me jerking off. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t Skyping my boyfriend, while both of us were totally naked. I had just told him to “put those toes in your mouth and I’ll cum like you’ve never seen before”. FML
Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML
Today, I was about to have sex with my wife, so I walked into our room naked, but then whacked myself in the nuts with the door handle as I attempted to close it. She can't stop laughing, and I can't sit down. FML
Today, when my girlfriend walked out the room, for a laugh, I covered my whole body except my knob in blankets. Then when I heard her come back in, I yelled, "Surprise!" It was her mom, who'd dropped by unannounced. FML
Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML
Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Well that'll make your next dinner party awkward. It's probably bad that she was giggling rather than gasping in awe.
thosedogtags 8
Your wife is sneaky.. Although, I wouldn't want my best friend seeing my husbands junk... Maybe it's her way of wanting a threesome?! Get it son! (;
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Comments (117)
inthedopeshow 17
I would be pretty pissed if I were you. She could have had the decency to at least mention Skype was on...
KingDead 18
She definitely knew she left it on haha!
cupcakechick 17
no shit Sherlock
KingDead 18
If you had looked through the comments.. It was a reply to someone questioning that motive... Idiot.
mr_sarcastic416 29
instead of calling her an idiot, you could have made it a little more clearer by posting your comment as a reply to the post from the person that was questioning the motive
KingDead 18
Yes, I agree with you, and I was also very new to all this when I got this app and signed up. BUT. Perhaps she shouldn't have thought ME as a fool by using that annoying phrase, and do her own snooping for fact to back her up.
mr_sarcastic416 29
I'm pretty new to the app as well.... how about calling truce, Say mistakes happened on both sides and we let it go? after all, it's just a website (and the 3 of us are Canadian, I know it's a stereotype, but we're supposed to be nice, we don't fight lol)
KingDead 18
I wasn't fighting, I was using my practical thinking. I'm not too considered about apologizing to someone who was in the wrong first! I don't hold grudges. So that's good enough for me.
cupcakechick 17
im not in the wrong at all, you should of posted it under the comment it was intended for, new or not, its not hard to figure out, and im not an idiot thank you very much,
cupcakechick 17
oh and I don't need to snoop because many people said that so this could be a repeat comment, so don't go saying things if u don't know the facts
KingDead 18
I was comment #16.. So definitely not a repeat of my original comment.. Still don't have your facts straight, once again. I'm not going to argue with some teenager. I've moved on.
cupcakechick 17
im not some teenager, im probably smarter then you, honors in all of my classes. maintaining a 95% average, etc, my facts are straight because before you there is a comment like that, so yes, it is a repeat comment,
Shrike 24
*I'm *teenager; *I'm *than *, maintaining *etc. *comment. Oops. It looks like horse shit is spewing from your mouth. You ******* idiot.
cupcakechick 17
its friggen 10pm I worked 10 hours today sorry if im not little miss perfect, and I spelt all of that right except I forgot 2 apostrophes my bad,
cupcakechick 17
and its FML im not gunna be using perfect grammar anyways, so I don't give a shit what you think,
ToBeDoc1192 6
Haha..thats embarrassing..but atleast u will have something to laugh about..!
fuzz97 23
Embarrassing? OMG NO WAY!!1 What brilliant observation will you make next, Einstein??
ToBeDoc1192 6
Here is another brilliant observation newton!!..ur attempt at being sarcastic failed miserably...u just sound rude
Pleonasm 36
It's Pay per View, so if it's too small to see, the fee is free.
maz95 17
I'm surprised your wife was okay with letting her friend watch on.
obviousboy 8
Bust a nut on the camera.
SayPeanuts 29
That's just cruel. If it had been the other way round everyone would be screaming to "dump him" and probably call the friend a pervert.
gracehi 33
I'll not usually a fan of these types of comments, but in this case I think it's true.
gracehi 33
*I'm
makeyourmark 4
So true
Zen_Mei 17
Ohmygoodness!! Well it's only fair she shows you HER goodies
perdix 31
Ladies love guys that can make them laugh. If your wife starts to give you shit, now you have a back-up plan ;)
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
That's ****** up , she should have told you the cam was on, wouldn't be so funny if you did that to her