Today, I was sleeping because I had been sick. The closest bathroom to mine is the one in my parents room. I wake up and feel like I have to throw up, I run into my parents room to go to the bathroom. I walk in on my parents having sex. Shocked, I gasp for air then throw up all over their bed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
Today, I was woken up to my mother screaming obscenities at me, all because I threw up last night after days of not feeling well, and the flushing of the toilet afterwards woke her up. FML
Today, I was feeling sick so I decided to lay down. As soon as I did, I felt the sudden urge to throw up, so I ran to the bathroom. When I bent over the toilet to throw up, my glasses fell in along with my vomit. Before I had a chance to retrieve them, I threw up again. And again. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt me jump out of bed, heard me run to the bathroom and throw up, then looked up five seconds later to see me take a massive dump on her bath mat. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw up. FML
Today, I woke up feeling extremely nauseous. When I started to feel better, I felt like I needed to spit. I went into the bathroom and opened the toilet to see someone had taken a giant crap the night before and forgotten to flush. The smell made me vomit all over my feet. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I woke up on the floor with my feet still in the bed. I had passed out while vomiting into a bucket, since I couldn't make it to the bathroom in time. The bucket had spilled all over my bed. FML
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Top comments
sunshyne84_fml 0
what a poor floorplan
yay_fml 0
hahahhahha... hahaha... I'm sorry but... hahahahahhahahaahhaa
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Comments (94)
sunshyne84_fml 0
what a poor floorplan
TaylorRenee444 0
Dude, you think about the floor plan when you read this???? Umm okay...
MoosesMeeses 0
Ur a bitch
audreyy062 2
I think his comment his funny...
Jared900DUmpling 30
@121 if you want the answer read #2's username. Also if you think about it it is a poorly made floorplan. Having a bathroom all the way across the house from the non-master bedrooms seems like a bad idea in general
yay_fml 0
hahahhahha... hahaha... I'm sorry but... hahahahahhahahaahhaa
brodizzle 0
Why did you run into your parents' room to go to the bathroom? Fail house design.
Doberman101 29
He obviously said it's the cloest bathroom to him.
Dr_Awesome654 24
My question is why he ran to their bed to throw up...
King_of_Kings 3
hey #5 he or she did that because that was the closest bathroom.
King_of_Kings 3
i found this to be very amusing
Kat_MS 0
#4 Yeah but that knowledge doesn't help the shock when you see it in action :P, and I assume it just triggered the throw-up that was going to happen anyway. When I feel sick usually I have an old bowl or bucket next to me in bed because I know I'll probably not reach the toilet in time, lol. If you have to run through your parents room to get to the bathroom maybe its a good idea to start doing something like that?
idontwantausern 1
this is possibly the most hilarious thing to ever happen to a human being
berii 0
Grody... They couldn't wait until you weren't sick anymore and at school or out shopping or something to freaking have sex?!?!? they deserved to have you throw up on their bed...
genius_man16 1
yes, because having sex when your daughter is sleeping is really gross and they deserve that. Not only that, but of course the parents don't have lives where they can just have sex when she is at school, cuz they don't have jobs or anything.
moig_fml 0
haha this has got to be one of the worst ive ever read. im seriously sorry. and yes, fail house design
Bibico_fml 0
I'm sure next time they're horny they'll lock the door. As if they'll ever be in the mood again.