Today, my new wife and I got back from our honeymoon. Her parents had dropped our wedding gifts off at our apartment, but didn't lock the door. We came home to start off our new life together to a wrecked apartment and no gifts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new wife and I got home from our honeymoon, and not an hour later she'd sat me down for a talk, saying, "Now that you're married you've got to act the part and give up this silly nonsense," then banned me from seeing my friends, playing video games, and basically everything else I ever enjoyed. FML
Today, I got home and found all my things thrown out into the yard, including the stuff from my mancave, which I spent thousands of dollars on. Apparently, my girlfriend stopped for a visit while my wife was home. I’d stupidly given her a key. Turns out my wife called out sick today. FML
Today, I returned home from my honeymoon and met my dad for coffee. He told me he's been seeing someone and he's so happy. It's my new mother-in-law. They moved in together during my wedding weekend. FML
Today, I got married. My new husband wanted to carry me over the threshold of our apartment, but he couldn't pick me up. FML
Today, my wife and I moved into our new place. I'm recovering from back surgery and out of work. To help make up the rent, her boyfriend moved in too. FML
Today, after a grueling business trip, my husband and I came home to all our furniture broken, every window smashed, all the floors scratched and carpets ripped, all our electronics stolen, and all our food and booze gone. What happened? Our son held a party and invited literally everyone he could from campus. FML
Today, my new neighbor broke into our new house because his key didn't work. We just closed on the house this week and changed the locks when footprints were found in the bathtub after the cleaning crew went through. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. When I got home from work, I came home to glitter. EVERYWHERE. Guess who forgot to get the key to his apartment back from his ex-girlfriend. The guy who's having his family over for dinner tonight. FML
Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML
Today, I came home from work to find white fabric and crystals all over the apartment floor. I followed the trail of destruction to my bedroom, where my roommate had left our closet door open. Apparently, her cats decided that my wedding gown was to be their newest conquest. FML
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Top comments
green_eyes124 0
wow! kind of seems like they should be responsible for buying you new gifts. I can't believe someone wouldn't make absolutely sure that the door to a place where people could've just seen you take a bunch of gifts was locked. it's like going christmas shopping at the mall, taking a handful of gifts to the car, and going back to shop more: the gifts will be gone when you get back. oh well... sorry op : (
LOLatU87 0
OMG kill your step parents!
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Comments (68)
I_have_no_clue 0
Sounds like a staged mugging. Check your inlaws to see if they have any shiny new items.
Kar98 6
Hahaha, that's what they /said/ happened.
smileygirl1234 0
aw how sad:( congrats though!
phorcep 0
1. Rent a U-Haul truck 2. Wait until your in-laws aren't at home 3. Load all of their belongings into the U-Haul 4. Drive back to your apartment and re-furnish it with your new (in-laws) belongings 5. ?????? 6. PROFIT
Mirorbo 27
Oh darling! I'm so sorry! There is no way you deserved that!
Jirobub 0
divorce
Mirorbo 27
Why?? So OP has to punish his wife for something her parents did?
substitutes 0
aw fyl
annanonomus 0
Oh no!! FYL!! That's terrible, I'm so sorry!
yourlifesmellsli 0
laugh out loud,u said "new wife" like u just bought her and if u did tell me where i can get one those
Sweetest_Cherry 0
They are too expensive #51... you don't want one!
UpYoursInAdvance 0
Had a similar experience but I was too young to understand so FYL OP, People are assholes...