Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. These days, she's a lawyer who makes six figures a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend a few years after I slept with his boss and got him fired. He is now a multi-millionaire investor and won't take me back. FML
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from 4 years ago. Turns out she hasn’t found love again since I broke it off with her for her best friend. She’s not the bubbly, cheery girl I met before. I can’t help but feel like an asshole. FML
Today, I saw my ex, who had dumped me for not being “ambitious” enough. I'd said she was just a gold digger and would die alone. She looked amazing at the fanciest, most expensive restaurant in town, and was celebrating being made partner at her law firm. I was bussing tables. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend of mine at the store. All was going fine, until she showed me her new fiancé. My now ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I saw my ex best friend and my cheating ex-girlfriend hanging out at the gym, where I work. They signed up here just to piss me off. It's working. FML
Today, the girl my ex-boyfriend cheated on me with had a job interview at my place of work. If she gets the job, she'll be my manager. FML
Today, my obsessive ex, who recently cut my phone line to stop me from talking to my boyfriend of three years, got a job at the same restaurant where both my boyfriend and I work. FML
Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend got engaged to a coworker. I got her the job. FML
Today, I had a meeting in the town where my ex-girlfriend works. After the meeting, I bought some ice cream and sat on a bench in a public place. She came across with her girlfriends laughing and obviously having fun. She only looked in my direction briefly. I threw the ice cream into the trash. FML
Today, I was eating a fancy dinner with my girlfriend at a restaurant. Suddenly, my ex-girlfriend, who was seemingly still angry after our breakup 2 years ago, saw me through the window. She walked in, took my spaghetti dinner, shoved it in my face, and stormed out. FML
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Top comments
carameldrizzle 0
moral is don't cheat
BicPlease 3
That's what I call epic karma, my friend.
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Comments (295)
fml98kevin 4
haha fail
kyanisaurus 0
Well it's a good thing she got rid of ya :D
skyeyez9 25
I don't think "Pizzaboy Swag" is an appropriate screen name. "cheating asshole" is more fitting.
Blueglasscup 18
You totally deserve that OP. Though I doubt you two would still be together anyway so nothing would've changed?
titmouselax 1
guess you shoulda done something with your life
Trololololololo_fml 7
Least you could do right now was apologize and throw in a free slice of pizza.
ImpendingRiot 0
lol I'm sorry for boning ur best friend, cheating on u, hurting ur feelings and breaking ur heart but hey here's a free slice of pizza since u seemed to get by pretty well without me
XxMaseratiGurlxX 1
hah i dont feel bad for you. YDI go get a life bitch.
lmaoatall 6
and on the mlf web site (my lifes funny)), she wrote, today I went to order a pizza. my ex, who cheated on me with my friend still works there. I'm a lawyer now. hahahaha...
SaracottaPie 5
If you had stayed with her, by the sounds of it you would have slowed her down anyway and not let her become the lawyer she is now. You did her a favour by cheating on her! It means she can have someone better!
Pinkanani 12
Lol, Draenei DK
CitrusGirl 0
Maybe you shouldn't have been an asshole cheater. Do you really expect sympathy for this? If she's a lawyer now that means it's been at least 4 years since high school. That is plenty of time for you to get some kind of education. So, you double deserve it for not making anything of yourself.
decembergirl1231 2
actually should be more like 8 years. have to get that Bachelors before you go to law school.
CitrusGirl 0
Yeah, but I know some people that go into college with 2.5 years already done. That's why I said at least.