dad
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Stop
Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year-old daughter texted me from her room, "Stop." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
ed5509
Chesapeake, United States
Revelations
Today, I received a text from a man my wife had an affair with, in which he stated that my 18 year-old daughter is biologically his. He then sent me pictures of her that my wife had sent to him. FML
MGZ
United States
Today, I told my 13 year-old daughter that she was grounded from using her phone. Later on, I get an important call regarding a job that I have been after. After I'd picked up the phone, my daughter starts screaming, "HELP! RAPE! HELP!" on the other phone. I don't think I'll be getting the job. FML
Noname
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML
OhFseriously123
Italy 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Oops54321
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
angrymother
🌶️ Spicy
Today, I caught my 20 year old daughter having sex with my best friend's husband. Apparently it's my fault for coming home early. FML
Anonymous
Spencer, United States
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
All kinds of wrong
Today, I had my girlfriend over after my wife went to work. She looked so sexy in her outfit, I couldn’t resist. I ripped her clothes off and began to do her on my couch… until I heard my daughter’s voice asking, “Dad, who’s that?” Apparently, she was home sick from school. FML
awskme
France 🌶️ Spicy
Disrespectful
Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfriend of nine months. She was making a lot of noise, so I told her to keep it down, and reminded her that my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later, I got a text from my sister, saying my parents wanted to make sure I was wearing a condom. FML
aprouddaddy
Paris, France
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Top comments
MissFae 0
Why are you checking texts in the middle of sex? We're gonna see your wife posting here next...
Edmund_Dantes 0
"in a minute!"
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Comments (219)
genius_man16 1
#79 is a god If the daughter really heard you guys having sex, then she could have, you know, GONE TO ANOTHER ROOM. I'm assuming you guys live in a house, and generally, that house has more than 2 rooms, and more than 1 floor. Unless you guys were being super loud, and even then she could have gone outside (although, it would be a /little/ weird if you were screaming at the top of your lungs with your daughter home, lol) And she's probably just another bitchy little girl who want's everything to go her way, and when something bugs her she wants it to "STOP" She should just go take a bitch pill and get over it. I hope that you wait until she first has sex, walk in and say "STOP" just to get back at her. It would bring the epic lulz.
Seegtease 0
A better idea would be for her to put her iPod (that she no doubt has several of, because she's clearly a spoiled brat) on, and blast it. I'm sure that would do the trick.
ficoy 0
good shit.
elfuzzo 0
Child needs to harden the **** up.
scarredforlife 0
Its not going to scar people, but honestly its nicer not to have to listen to your parents going at it -.-
loveleafs16 0
I feel SO bad for your daughter.
thewelshmetal 0
next time she has a boy round, text her, 'i watching you, be good' lol
heythed12 0
we're gonna see your daughter write here next. i've caught my parents doing it and i almost threw up.
jim_witness 0
Do they have the same name and were you screaming it?? That may be another issue
liveitlearnit 0
75. It's called having sex, with a partner that's been blowing my mind for two years. But thanks for jumping to conclusions that I can't get laid because I wasn't a slutty child. 79. It's called being quiet. You can enjoy yourself without robbing your children of innocence. OP is classless and shouldn't be a parent- end of story.