Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, I walked in on my daughter making out with a piece of paper with someone from the cast of IT taped to her pillow. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML
Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML
Today, I was holding hands with my daughter and she wanted to skip. When I went to skip I accidentally kneed her in the face. Everyone saw her holding her busted lip and pointing at me. FML
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Smart kid. She seems like the responsible sort.
flockz 20
scotch tape isn't safe enough. as her mother i hope you suggested duct tape.
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Comments (203)
ex_stripper_jk 20
Okay, that's just too cute. And you can use that story against her when she's 16 and has a REAL boyfriend.
JadeWinter 16
Hahaha I love your daughter
slowlybreakingme 14
Brilliant.
Jharrist89 12
You have a smart kid! But she's 11...how does she know about protection already?
7yzzFML 17
Why shouldnt she? 11 is a very good age to know about sex. In Australia we have full sex ed at 11, and its the perfect time for it, and it felt right. Shes normal. Are you?
7yzzFML 17
No, she is not too young to socialize with and kiss boys. What kind of odd kid were you back at that age?
Kuhu1993 21
ADORABLE! I don't think you have to worry about her.
Judahsh 8
thats so cute!!!
Attica 20
Cute. What I don't understand is that you seem offended by the fact they were kissing, or that your eleven year old has a "boyfriend" (I do understand being upset at the lie, though, of course). She's eleven... at that age, kissing is innocent and so is "dating". It's not like they would have been full-on making out by adult or teenage standards. Puppy love is a rite of passage. Also, your disapproval and any attempts to stop them from seeing each other just make a "boyfriend/girlfriend" even more appealing to your child. I wouldn't worry too much... She seems like a very responsible girl, especially for her age.
7yzzFML 17
Completely agreed, I hope OP is not one of those retard super-conservative over-protective parents..
flfsu84 3
Protection or not, she's going to be a *****. Wtf is there a guy in your living room?
7yzzFML 17
.Seriously? Wow, grow up. Obviously you were homeschooled by a religious couple.
Futacy 30
I think she's ready for "the talk"