Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, I walked in on my daughter making out with a piece of paper with someone from the cast of IT taped to her pillow. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML
Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML
Today, I was holding hands with my daughter and she wanted to skip. When I went to skip I accidentally kneed her in the face. Everyone saw her holding her busted lip and pointing at me. FML
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Smart kid. She seems like the responsible sort.
flockz 20
scotch tape isn't safe enough. as her mother i hope you suggested duct tape.
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Comments (203)
cptverderosa 11
At least she's on the right track about protection
TypoH 7
When I was 11, I was scared to even hug my girlfriend.
TITUS92 8
Well that little girl deserves a reward
BlitzPKF 10
She's a blonde isn't she.
markuskind 7
Whats the big deal? Oh no, a kiss:(((
Julianne_sings 10
You've got to admit it though, it is kind of cute! At least you know she'll be responsible when she gets older.
NerdGirl321 27
Hey at least she's using protection ;)
Ziggy122 15
Looks like you're gonna have to give her "the talk" soon. At least you know she'll be careful and use protection later once she knows what it's really for...
xXNerrrdXx 16
So cute it made my day xD although i'd have to say she is a bit too young to kisss
7yzzFML 17
No she isn't.
khildebrand2294 9
That's a thing now?! These kids today aren't going in the direction we planned...