Today, in the middle of hot passionate sex with my husband, he stops and tells me he won't be able to finish until I go brush my teeth. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
Today, having been in a bit of a dry spell, my husband woke up feeling frisky. I was feeling it too, but I asked if he could get up and brush his teeth as I’d already brushed mine and wanted to have some fun. Instead, he stormed off, insisting I'd ruined the mood. Sorry but morning breath is gross. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be spontaneous and do something sexy. I started taking his underwear off with my teeth. My teeth dragged over his shaft, and my braces cut up his foreskin in the process. Now he's not talking to me. FML
Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML
Today, my husband and I got into an argument over him not brushing his teeth. It ended with him snapping his toothbrush in half. He's 52. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML
Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML
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Top comments
Hgielad_720 0
Awww that sucks. But that's really gross! You should brush your teeth before, OP.
funzcpl 0
ewwwwwwww! for a guy to actually stop in the middle of sex must mean your breath smelled like ass!
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Comments (62)
Shover 0
Option A : Brush before you get naked Option B : Orange Tic Tacs if you're in that much of a hurry
oliveindamiddle 0
the orange ones are the best!
blinks 0
You should have said 'Well my breath was fresh before you made me go down on you'
perdix 31
He should have just tossed your salad -- it would have tasted better.
lllaura425 0
maybe it was early in the morning and she hadn't gotten out of bed yet to brush her teeth. morning breath is fatal
Willdub 0
Or maybe she just had a big plate of shit for dinner.
KaintukeeBob 13
'brush your teeth' with his member (only don't use teeth, it hurts). He'll finish. Though he may complain about your breath more often ;-)
alltimelowluv 0
lmfao YDI for not brushing your teeth. haha sick.
MissPo3s 0
It wasn't as hot and passionate as you thought, OP.
randiZ25 0
It's marriage, that goes with the territory. I've said that to my husband before. It's not the end of the world. He's not going anywhere. Try and be a little less sensitive OP or brush your teeth more routinely. =)
hurshanandwala 0
Hey sexy
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Ugh, this is such a pet peeve of mine. YDI, OP. You can't always help having bad breath, but you *can* choose to not get offended when someone you love tells you about it. If you just went down on him, respect his preference to "clean up" before continuing. You'd already know about that preference anyway. If you just woke up, put on the brakes for two minutes and do it together. If you ate something smelly, well, you're SOL for now. Next time have him take a bite too, especially if he doesn't like it. Better to taste it for a few minutes than smell it for hours.