Today, I used the bathroom on a bus from New York to Boston, and carefully covered the seat with twenty of the single-square toilet paper rations. As I was peeing, the bus flew over a bump and swerved sharply, and my entire naked bottom was splashed with urine and poop. It wasn't my own. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while getting on a city bus, I sat down on a urine-soaked seat. FML
Today, the coach bus I was riding almost crashed. I was using the restroom at the time. The bus braked so hard, I peed all over the wall and splashed my shirt. Nobody wanted to sit anywhere near me after that. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Today, I was on a plane when I suddenly felt the need to use the toilet. I didn't make it in time and I had to spend the remainder of my trip in soiled clothes. FML
Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML
Today, I took a long distance train across country. Early on I had an urgent need to use the bathroom. As I went to flush away the nasty, the preflush water violently projected my diarrhoea onto my pants before clearing the rest down the gurgler. I have 8 hours left on the train. FML
Today, I was on a standing on a crowded bus going home after school. A wriggling 5 year old boy and his mum left the seat to get off the bus. Since no one looked keen to sit on the seat, I did, only to find out that it was covered in pee. FML
Today, I was on a plane when I had to use the bathroom. While pulling up my pants, the flush button got stuck and the water kept running. I tried to fix it, but ended up flooding the bathroom and the aisle. The attendants had to give me a towel and escort me back to my seat with everyone on the plane staring at me. FML
Today, I was on a crowded bus on the way back from my boyfriend's when I suddenly had a terrible nose bleed. I had no tissues, so instead I had to use last night's underwear from my bag. FML
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
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Top comments
ForestFire0 1
The irony here is that if you hadn't wasted time with the TP seat cover, you would have been done and out of the bathroom before the bump.
Rok_fml 0
I hate public toilets D:
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Comments (132)
hatehatehatehate 0
I still hope you're my ex-girlfriend.
hollisterhottiex 0
lmfao thats why you don't use those bathrooms. i took a school trip on one, and had to pee like a russian race horse.. i held it for two and a half hours and ran like hell to the bathroom when we stopped haha. you coulda avoided this my friend.
Tsukasa_fml 0
Lesson #1 of public transit: Never, ever use the restroom!
Bumlove89 0
@76, thats how my friend's mom got a bladder infection. Its not healthy holding it on for a long period of time. Plus, when you gotta go, you gotta go.
maandaa_0 0
wow, fail.
Ric3ball 0
Haha #52 :D
rakhil11 7
omg
deliciouskaek 1
@77 - And yet, there's no possibility of infection from the shit that just happened (no pun intended). =/ It's a four-hour bus ride, it wouldn't have killed her to either go before getting on, or wait until she got off.
Sumguy 0
How nasty is that!!! I know some one who got a boil on their ass from sitting bare-bottom on a public toilet(it was in a subway station though, rofl). I don't blame you at all, I used to work in construction. I used to have to layer up the seat before taking a poo. Just for peace of mind. There are several types on infections you can actually get from sitting bare ass on a public bowl.
Osakhomen 0
#81... it actually could do a lot of damage. I had a teacher who passed out from holding her pee to long. Instead, learn to pee standing up... or hover over the seat...