Today, the coach bus I was riding almost crashed. I was using the restroom at the time. The bus braked so hard, I peed all over the wall and splashed my shirt. Nobody wanted to sit anywhere near me after that. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I stood for half an hour in the rain waiting for my bus. As I started to go inside, my bus turned around the corner and splashed water all over me. The bus driver wouldn't let me on the bus because I was soaking wet and I would "mess up the seats". FML
Today, I used the bathroom on a bus from New York to Boston, and carefully covered the seat with twenty of the single-square toilet paper rations. As I was peeing, the bus flew over a bump and swerved sharply, and my entire naked bottom was splashed with urine and poop. It wasn't my own. FML
Today, while getting on a city bus, I sat down on a urine-soaked seat. FML
Today, in the bus, my Gatorade bottle's badly screwed cap resulted in my Jello being ruined and yellow Gatorade poured all over myself, the seat, and the floor. It looks like I pissed myself, and I still have to go through a whole building where several of my colleagues live before making it home. FML
Today, I was on a bus with a whole bunch of athletes at a ski competition. I had to go to the bathroom, so I walked to the back and I let the floodgates open up. When I came out, everyone who was at the back of the bus near the bathroom had moved to the front because the smell was so putrid. Everyone was staring at me. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML
Today, I was on my hour long bus ride home with a full bladder. Right as the bus reached my stop, the time I spent holding it in was over. I didn't make it out of the aisle before I peed my pants. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML
Today, I was on a standing on a crowded bus going home after school. A wriggling 5 year old boy and his mum left the seat to get off the bus. Since no one looked keen to sit on the seat, I did, only to find out that it was covered in pee. FML
Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML
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Top comments
thawny_fml 21
Silver lining. More leg room for however long the trip was.
PoolDeadio 12
There's pros and cons to having a restroom on a moving bus. This is a con.
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Comments (41)
thawny_fml 21
Silver lining. More leg room for however long the trip was.
ghaith 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Theres a washroom in a coach bus?
tranced_ 45
There's life on another planet in our universe?
Skycop_S 23
Say that it's lemonade.
moniculkin 19
With given time, it's not going to smell lemony.
mjtg25 3
I mean I hope not...
GirlGamer12345 22
Wouldn't they know they went in without lemonade?
queerdragon 20
So now on top of smelling like a homeless person, they also are going to try to convince people they drink pee lemons?
Imnotreallyblack 10
isn't it a bit late for that kind of advice?
homesuckfucker 28
That sucks, but it's not your fault! And they weren't grossed out by you. Just the pee- you wouldn't sit by someone covered in pee on the bus, would you? So try not to take it personally.
mjtg25 3
pee on someone else who was mocking you then sit next to them and tell them you know how it feels. that, OP, is how you make friends for life.
krazy789 28
I mean can you really blame them for wanting to put distance between you and them?
PoolDeadio 12
There's pros and cons to having a restroom on a moving bus. This is a con.
liquifiednate 21
This is so true. I remember my senior year of high school we took a bus from where I live to Disneyland, which is about a 12 hour drive. So obviously we would need to use the bathroom occasionally. Well the bus driver warned us, "don't use the bathroom while the bus is moving because you'll piss all over yourself." And my dumbass though, "oh yeah right, but just to be safe I'll hold it in until I get there." Well eventually I ended up having to pee really bad during the trip and I couldn't hold it in so I went to use the restroom on the bus while it was moving. And with my luck the bus ended up having to halt to a screeching stop and I ended up pissing all over the wall. Thankfully nothing got on my clothing but I was in the bathroom for quite some time cleaning up the walls before I left, that way it was clean for the next person. It sucked haha
NotGabe 28
That's why it's always best to play it safe; always sit down to pee in a moving bus.
wjohn717 13
#37 usually there's signs that say too sit down too haha
_ravens_ 11
At least it DIDN'T crash while you were in there
kaylocca 20
So lay back and enjoy the ride. Your shirt will dry might not smell great but it's not the worst that could've happened in that situation. My friend had a much worse experience on a coach bus bathroom with a bumpy ride.
c0ffeeb3an 15
That is precisely why I never go to restrooms on buses. Ever. And I've had a handful of 16 hours trips.
CuriousYel1ow 13
Well no shit; just piss.