Today, while cleaning out my garage, I found a pregnant spider. I couldn't step on the spider without releasing the baby spiders, so I went inside to get a glass jar to trap it. While trying to relocate the spider, I accidentally stepped on it. I now have a bunch of baby spiders roaming around. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was changing my sheets, I found a huge spider under my pillow. My 10 year-old sister had to get rid of it for me. FML
Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
Today, for the first time in about 3 years, I decided to clean my car. It was going really well until I looked down at what I was about to pick up. On the back seat floor lay a dead snake, which at one point, for God knows how long, was living in my car while I unknowingly drove it around. FML
Today, I had my first glass of red wine after months of pregnancy and giving birth. Just as I sat down and started to relax, I spilled it all over myself and my in-law’s couch. FML
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML
Today, I was having my morning coffee while getting ready for work. I grabbed clothes off the floor to throw in the hamper. I accidentally threw my full coffee instead. FML
Today, I pulled one of my favorite hoodies out of my closet, and immediately noticed several large stains on it. Apparently, my dad had managed to open a hole in the roof and couldn't be bothered to patch it, so a squirrel got in and used my closet as a litter box. FML
Today, I was on the toilet when my cat came in and jumped up on the sink. Apparently my lap looked like a comfier seat, so she jumped onto it. She misjudged the distance, but luckily caught herself by sliding to a stop, with her claws in my bare thighs. FML
Today, I was talking with a very attractive coworker outside when a moth flew into my ear. I started screaming and hitting my ear because it was stuck and alive in my ear. I spent the rest of the day at the ER. I'm forever known as The Moth Lady. FML
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Top comments
bethan1 4
For some reason I read this as "I found a pregnant sister" it was way cooler that way.
Lounia_fml 8
At 18 :P
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Comments (200)
robc32ca 4
murderer! now you must care for the babies as they were your own!
TheyCallMeThumpe_fml 0
win.
iheartglasses 0
Thats why you squish and then rub :) They can't get away. Your best bet is to now bomb you garage for spiders before those little ones get inside your house!
iheartglasses 0
And for those commenters saying spiders only lay eggs, yes I've only seen eggs but what OP might have meant by pregnant is the spider was carrying the sac which the eggs hatch in. I have seen that also and yes I saw them all crawl out. YUCK!
adidas125 0
Okay dumbfucks, spiders lay eggs, duh. But some carry the eggsac on their back. Therefore, if you step on it it bust & if its mature enough the baby spiders will escape. This can happen. I've done it twice. It isn't an uncommon thing. This isn't a "made-up" fml. Its legit. Watch animal planet sometime before you post something you know NOTHING about.
nitemare0 17
fake, spiders lay eggs which hatch only when ready, so anything inside a spider would not be able to crawl away
TiffanyBlews27 0
Did you read 57 or 61's comments at all?? The mama spider didn't put the egg sac anywhere yet, so it was on her back. It must have been mature enough for the baby spiders to escape. It happens quite often. My grandfather did it... Let's just say that I still refuse to step foot in that house.
MissFML14 1
eww , thats disgusting.
agamid 1
poor spiders :(
Samyy27 0
how can you tell it's pregnant?
Fop 6
By the huge lump on its back?
Zebidee 9
Because it was craving pickles and ice-cream.
robc32ca 4
mood swings and loose clothing. oh and wears flats!
softball019 0
ummm don't spiders lay eggs? I'm pretty sure they rnt pregnant.
brunetteninja85 0
it was not a pregnant spider. spiders do not give birth to their young. it was probably a female wolf spider with babies riding on her back. still very creepy though...