Today, I was talking with a very attractive coworker outside when a moth flew into my ear. I started screaming and hitting my ear because it was stuck and alive in my ear. I spent the rest of the day at the ER. I'm forever known as The Moth Lady. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was clipping my abnormally thick toenails. I had to apply so much pressure on the clippers that a nail flew off, hit me in the eyeball and scratched my cornea. The doctor nearly fell off his chair laughing during my eye exam after I told him what happened. FML
Today, while I was eating spicy wings, I suddenly sneezed. I was sitting in front of a fan and effectively maced myself when my spicy sneeze blew back into my face and eyes. FML
Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML
Today, I saw a long black hair coming out of the drain. Thinking it was my sister's, I called her in and pulled it out for her to see, only to realize I was actually pulling out a long brown roach by the antenna. FML
Today, at work, I jumped under my desk in fear of a nuclear missile attack when the firestation next us let out its new awareness siren. I think I'm going insane. FML
Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML
Today, a colleague found out that I struggled with anorexia when young. After ranting about how it's a silly 'Women's disease', he renamed me 'Miss Piggy' and made oinking noises every time I ate something. FML
Today, I called a pest control company to ask them to come over to my place to help get rid of rats. The person on the phone told me to "be a man and stop acting like a girl". I'm a woman. FML
Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I approached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML
Today, I learned how birds feel when they fly into windows. I should be getting the hospital bill for my broken nose in the mail soon. FML
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Top comments
lukian_fml 29
I've had this happen in my bedroom. It's best to remain calm and let someone remove it. It's quite hard though, given how loud something fluttering inside your ear is.
species4872 20
Stay away from bright lights,
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Comments (14)
glssfsh14 7
Had almost the same thing happen (in Texas), with a roach.
lukian_fml 29
I've had this happen in my bedroom. It's best to remain calm and let someone remove it. It's quite hard though, given how loud something fluttering inside your ear is.
domolovesyoshi 33
I've always had problems with my ears, I couldn't hear for the first year of life so a loud fluttering bug in ear would cause me pain so I'd find it very hard to stay still, it could also damage the repair done by the docs, your advice is sound though really good, I just thought I'd add my story, hahahaha.
CrassKal 27
#7 - It's... a moth. What damage is it capable of? And for the record, pour alcohol in your ear. It will kill the bug and dry it up so that it will be easier to remove.
MallowMistress 13
It can scratch your ear drum. I had a friend have the same issue, but she thought the moth was still there when she went to the emergency room. The moth had minorly scratched her ear drum, leaving her with the sensation the moth was still there.
SpyroMello 29
#14 I hope you realize that animals no matter how small, can harm you if stuck inside you (say chew on your ear drum) and pouring alcohol in your ear will go directly to the brain and can cause ear infection hence why going swimming can cause ear infection. I wonder how you're alive thinking that information is credible.
izzajaneful 24
That is horrifying.
species4872 20
Stay away from bright lights,
Bullshitticus 19
Why would you hit it in if you are trying to get it out?
gracehi 33
At least you can blame the moth for your behavior. Me? I once uttered the words, "My brain is retarded" to a co-worker I had a crush on. Long story. Don't you feel less silly now?
Lalala579121 28
You think you can get away with just saying "long story" and not telling the whole story?
gracehi 33
Well, like I said, my brain is retarded, so don't expect me to think good.
Lalala579121 28
That's not a valid excuse for not telling the story.
gracehi 33
Okay. Well, you see, what had happened was, I was having a hard time hearing him and kept asking him to repeat himself. I apologized and explained about my hearing disorder. My ears work fine, it's that my brain doesn't always process sounds correctly. He was teasing me (it was cool because we were friendly like that) and said, "So what you're saying is, you're retarded." I replied, "No, my brain's retarded" promptly followed by, "Wait! No! That's not what I meant!" Unfortunately he couldn't hear my correction over his laughing. Actually, it's not a long story. I'm just lazy, I guess.
Lalala579121 28
That's not even a bad story. He probably thought it was cute/funny.
gracehi 33
Ignore this comment. It was meant to be a reply. -.-
Lexyy17 18
This happened to my dad years ago. But he was at our family's camp on an island at least 2 hours from the nearest dr.
RichardPencil 32
It's not your nickname forever if you change jobs and omit the moth incident from your resume (that is not considered fraud). Otherwise, bribe some of your coworkers to morph your nickname to Mothra -- that was one bad-ass monster!
creditless 14
u shouldn't have lured it in there with the sweet smell of your ear nectar
Etweens96 25
The best thing to do is to remain calm and have baby oil poured into that ear until the flapping stops. When it does go to the ER to have it removed