Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was standing in a queue when an old lady turned, looked straight at me, and asked me to hold her bag. Confused, I took a hold of it. She started screaming for help claiming I was stealing her shopping. Turns out, she was talking to her husband behind me. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, I was walking out of the train station when an old man grabbed me. I started screaming, yelling, "HELP" like a madwoman and tried pushing him away - that's when I saw the golf cart rush past me. He was trying to push me aside from getting run over. Everyone started laughing. FML
Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store, waiting in line to pay. A man jumped me from behind, and my first reflex was to brutally elbow him in the face. I soon discovered my attacker was one of the patients at the disability house at which I work, and he was trying to hug me. FML
Today, I was yelled at by a bunch of angry people because I couldn't physically move out of the way while 10 more tried to force their way onto a subway in Shanghai. Then one old lady started hitting me with her purse to get me to move even more. FML
Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML
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Top comments
abNormal62 23
So apparently, neither of you were completely stable when this occurred?
Hidghetti 14
I would've done the same thing
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Comments (68)
StickyPickles 33
Could have been a lot worse if the op instinctively turned and slapped/punched the old man.
poppunkette 22
If that's your reflex reaction well **** me! Poor old guy. Hope you apologised
KawaiiPinkie 11
Wonder what you would do if you thought someone was stealing you bag. Turn around and watch him/her do it?
poppunkette 22
Not yell **** off Id tighten my grip on the bag and turn around you know see if there is a plausible reason for it
Zebediabolical 45
It's pretty easy to play monday morning quarterback with this kind of thing. But in the heat of the moment most people won't react calmly.
Brandi_Faith 34
I agree with 23 actually. Maybe it's cause I live in suburbia Canada, but if I felt as tug on my purse, I'd hold my grip tighter and turn around and see what's happening. My first thought would've been someone bumping into it accidentally, someone tripping and grabbing it, or it getting caught on something or someone. It's kind of sad you guys live where your first thought is someone is stealing it & need to tell them to F off. I've never had anything stolen and live in a place where it's very unlikely for someone to grab your purse and run. Depends what your reaction is based on where you live I guess.
poppunkette 22
Guess if you grow up in a town where you can leave your bag unattended your not as suspicious
iwanttogotoparis 26
Happens to the best of us
sdroze1389 31
hey I've caught an old man trying to pick me, just cause someone is old doesn't mean they can't be thieves. that seems like a innocent way to make contact and the stick could be a prop
otecasacid 22
Your reflex was protective, I'm sure lots of people would do the same. You probably didn't upset the old guys day too much especially if you apologized
ZG_Rules 14
Well, if you live in a city with a lot of crime I guess it is an easy mistake to make. Just apologize and all will be good
jk_waks23 19
I hope that man didn't take much offence from that. And later on forgave you or at least understood you! :) will be waiting for a follow up comment OP!
Makko 20
Same here
loserman67 36
You yell "**** OFF" out of reflex? I understand that you may have been upset, thinking that someone might have been trying to steal you backpack, but come on Dude, sounds like you have some anger issues
Rosebudx 32
Old people can be thieves, too. He might have just played innocent because you caught him in the act.
Aseemdawg 18
YDI for yelling **** off
limabeans101029 21
Personally, I think that yelling something along the lines of "**** off" when you think someone is trying to steal your bag is a pretty natural reaction.