Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a woman drop her wallet in the grocery store. Being a good citizen, I sprinted after her to return it. She heard me running, panicked and took off. I ended up chasing her through three aisles saying, “Wait! I have your wallet!” Security got involved. FML
Today, I was leaving a campus parking garage. Suddenly, a huge man appeared behind me and kept saying "HEY!" "STOP!" In a gruff voice. I picked up my pace and so did he. I finally turned to him with a can of mace and threatened to use it. He was trying to return the $5 bill I dropped. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I went to the store, but after I'd selected my items, I saw that I'd forgotten my wallet. When I tried to explain to the cashier, he thought that I was trying to steal and called the cops. My roommate had to come to the store to save me. FML
Today, I realized I'd lost my wallet when paying for groceries. I had to put all the items back and leave the store feeling so embarrassed in front of everyone. FML
Today, I helped a "blind" man across the street. He kindly said thank you and patted me on the back. Then, I went into a store and realized my wallet was missing. FML
Today, I walked two miles to the store, filled my cart with groceries, and got to the cashier… only to find I had forgotten my wallet. I tried to explain but got the nastiest stank-eye from the cashier, the manager, and everyone in line behind me. I walked two miles home, hungry and embarrassed. FML
Today, after shopping alone at a grocery store, I was taking my groceries back to my car when a kid grabbed one of my bags and ran. Deciding not to risk leaving the rest of my groceries stranded, I didn't chase him. Later, I realized that was the bag my credit card was in. FML
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Top comments
Omfgitsmia 15
He could've just yelled that you dropped your wallet.
picante72 24
The mediocre Samaritan.
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Comments (142)
iloveandy143 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What the hell? He was being such a douche I'm surprised he didn't just steal your wallet
AssTard 15
He wasn't being a douche. He returned someone's wallet even though he could have easily pocketed it. The fact that he called OP an asshole because OP was running from him stands obsolete in comparison to his good deed.
HaneenDixon 16
I agree with 10. Plus we don't know the dude, maybe he's not a people person that's why he called OP that way but that doesn't make him a total douche. He was actually trying to help. He had good intentions so give him a break with your judgmental attitude. :/
iloveandy143 7
Haha ok, well I agree that it was good that he actually returned the wallet and did the honest thing, but really calling someone an asshole is suddenly acceptable if one is socially awkward ?
HaneenDixon 16
I'm not saying it should be acceptable, but sometimes exceptions could be made. I'm socially awkward, and honestly, patience is not one of my virtues! So if i was trying to do a good thing for someone and they make me have to chase them down, i'd be calling him a a-hole too (but I don't curse so probably switch it to nimrod). Thumb me down, but that's the truth..
HaneenDixon 16
On behalf of the rude guy with good intentions, I apologize for him calling OP an a-hole. Also, I'd also like to apologize for him not being perfect such as "yourselves". I forgot how people will ALWAYS overlook your good deeds and point out your mistakes. Peace out...
iloveandy143 7
Thank god, 38, someone who finally sees it my way lol :) was wondering when that would happen, was startin to lose my faith in humanity
marxsoul55 9
Isn't it judgemental that you're (18) judging him as a nice person for giving the wallet back???
Ameel_fml 19
#44: Being "perfect" has nothing to do with it though. And nobody here is claiming they're perfect anyway. But it's not difficult to NOT call someone an "asshole" if you're trying to get their attention. It doesn't matter if the guy is socially awkward or what, he's still pretty dickish for thinking it's acceptable to call some stranger an asshole. For all he knows, OP is deaf or simply didn't hear him. He could have run up and tapped OP on the shoulder, or said "excuse me?", or said "hey! You forgot your wallet!" But starting off with "Hey you!" then "I said stop, asshole!"...well, no wonder OP thought he was intimidating!
SammyS2012 21
Im socially awkward too but i would never try to return a wallet by calling someone rude names. he could have tried to address them in a nonintimidating way (excuse me ms/sir)... We cant judge the situation at all. you can say he is misunderstood hero or claim he is giving the wallet back for other reasons (nothing of value, someone else saw him drop the wallet too, impress someone). it's silly for you to get upset with others and react so negatively while supporting the man when you dont know the whole story. all we can do is say he did a good deed in a rude way.
rachelita2107 5
He didnt call op an asshole, OP called him an asshole for following "her" and yelling for her to stop.
rachelita2107 5
Nvm i read that wrong ignore my comment
AKGirlinSD 20
I returned a neighbor's wallet. I ran after him and his wife while they were driving away. I just yelled, "I have your wallet that you dropped!" He slammed on his breaks, opened his door and thanked me. I only opened it to see the ID. When he thanked me, he offered me money. I declined because I'd hope someone would do the same for me. OP shouldn't have called the guy an asshole but the do gooder should've yelled that he was trying to give him his wallet. Do gooders are rare but most people expect/fear for the worst. I'm in no way siding with OP. It's just sad what this world has come to.
fucking_dev 2
cool dog 1 .. I now miss my dogs :c
MaydayParadexx 18
106- OP didn't call him an asshole. Reread it slowly.
Bubbelz 25
18 So he's a partial douche? Like the right half of his body is douchy?
NigerianMedicine 11
Welcome to Russia.
AKGirlinSD 20
Thanks, 111. I misread that. No excuses from me but I shouldn't comment on no sleep while bring pumped full of meds, in the hospital. I just made a rule for myself so I don't keep misreading FMLs.
waffule365 16
I guess a lesson here is to never assume the worst.
HaneenDixon 16
But what if you never assume the worst and you actually do get mugged. So the lesson would be the opposite?
Livestrong14 7
You can never be to careful these says.
jbsington 8
It's probably best to assume the worst if you live in Moscow, as OP does. People are usually not as friendly there as they are in the US or in Canada.
ThePK 5
Well, I mean if he already lost his wallet (albeit unknowingly), then he really didn't have to fear being mugged!
noncomposmentis 6
I think OP's reaction is perfectly understandable if you remember the fact that he lives in Russia, a place with extremely high crime rate. Edit: Just saw #72's comment.
RpiesSPIES 27
#72... There's friendly people in the U.S?
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
#92 I swear to god. Come to new York city. Oh, people here will return your wallet. After they spit in it, spit on your shoe, then spit on you for "wasting their time".
HaneenDixon 16
83, sweetie, I'm being sarcastic! I disagree with what 2 said, and 53 said exactly what I was thinking. No "contradiction at it's finest".. I know it's hard to convey tone through comments but I was opposing 2's comment, savvy! Before you jump down my throat, please try to understand what's going on (¬_¬) Ps. I wasn't making OP the bad guy eh!
AKGirlinSD 20
2, you might be a distant relative to my boyfriend. He always expects the best.
nigsuzzi 3
Theyr'e*
Omfgitsmia 15
He could've just yelled that you dropped your wallet.
MCRaddict15 15
if someone called me an asshole to tell me I dropped my wallet I'd be pretty scared too
AlexaWuzHere 31
Agreed, if someone wants to give a wallet back they shouldn't scream "Hey YOU." That clearly just scares people. I think something more along the lines of "Sir/Ma'am" would have been better.
tacojauns 45
Well I like how he interpreted it as Hey you I going to mug you.
Ameel_fml 19
To be fair, "Hey you!" can be interpreted as an intimidating sort of phrase. Especially if it's said in an aggressive way. That's the sort of crap some drunk asshole would shout before they king-hit someone. So it doesn't hurt to be safe and assume the worst of strangers. It's better than assuming the best, and ending up with a broken jaw and a missing wallet.
Ki11erC 18
He also could of just kept the wallet. -.-
HKCgrimmjow 15
Well stop asshole! Geez I was just wanting to give you your wallet! "Wait where's my money?" *runs away*
jkmartinjk 16
Couldn't just glance behind you?
PenguinBitch 44
The moment she glances behind her someone suddenly appears and covers her with a pillowcase while a bear mauls her. Why risk the odds?
picante72 24
Pedobear has no interest in your wallet, only your fannypack.
SirCharles83 13
15- he* him* him* him*
andyyroxx 20
41- Good catch - I thought you were just chanting a tribal hymn.
PenguinBitch 44
41-*I *have *the *app
RpiesSPIES 27
I have it, too. You can see the icon clear as day indicating OP is male.
KickItHigh 32
Not all FML apps show gender.
CharresBarkrey 16
I've had the iPhone and the Android apps and both showed gender. Which apps are left?
dashizam 10
There are about five versions of the app. Heck, there's even two "Official" versions!
KickItHigh 32
102: You do understand that there are other mobile platforms other than Android and iPhone, right?
Rababco 29
@15 That reminds me of How I Met Your Mother and Marshall's paranoid of something bad happening, like a bear mauling him. XD
Reaper1984 13
he could've told you he had your wallet from the get go
ClippersFan310 4
Exactly!
Ki11erC 18
He could've kept it from the get go. I'm not really sure much thought goes into announcing what you're doing when its a kind favour.
picante72 24
The mediocre Samaritan.
myoukei 31
Imagine if all you had to fear when walking down the street alone is someone being a decent human being. This seems like a good thing, not a FML or a YDI.... :/
ironichalibut 24
So inconsiderate, all he's trying to do is help and you make him go for a jaunt! What if he had a condition!?
ironichalibut 24
Today, on my way home from getting groceries someone called out to me, "Hey you." Being paranoid I began to walk faster until they yelled, "Hey Asshole!" because they were straining to keep up with me. I still walked faster until I heard them collapse from a moderate heart attack, and had to get my wallet off them before buying apologetic flowers, FML.
royb2g 6
"Pardon me sir, it seems as though you have left your wallet behind. I wish to return it to you"
kishorekumar_a 10
It is difficult to say that when OP is walking away fastly. If OP is paranoid then nothing that man says or shouts will come across as helpful only suspicious.
botanistjessica 24
Fastly.
Alexis2742 31
Quickly* ??
Ella_fml 17
This would be a better way of phrasing it. But you can't blame the guy if he was chasing him and could have not had found better vocabulary. Often, is in Moscow stores is, "You *****. Why the ***** didn't you give me exact change?" and if you ask the bus driver when the bus will stop a likely reply is "It'll stop when I ***** feel like stopping it". Personally, after hearing it enough, rudeness seems like an everyday Russian thing.
ms_YoungMula 8
OP is a bit of a douche for assuming this man had bad intentions
DWordHead16 19
#127, and well, to everyone else who think OP is wrong for assuming the worst: think about it this way. We are always told "better be safe than sorry". OP was most likely looking out for himself. I'm sure some people have a negative connotation with someone yelling, especially if it's something like "Hey YOU!" Because it's startling. Riiiiight?