Today, I mentioned to my parents that, considering the state of the world, the government needs to get its act together and ban guns, gas cars, meat, animal products, and plastic, among other things. They threatened to kick me out, saying I should "go live with the other dumbass hippies." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't agree to convert to their new brand of Christianity. This is a day after they ranted at me about how I should speak my mind more and not let myself be controlled by other people. FML
Today, after telling my parents that I want to be a vegetarian, I got grounded. Apparently, "black people can't be vegetarians" and, I'm "crazy for even suggesting something like that." FML
Today, my parents disowned me because I told them I don’t want kids. FML
Today, I tried to confront my parents with the fact that they're almost certainly going to outlive me unless I radically change my lifestyle, and that I needed their assistance to help me stay on track. I only realized after my impassioned speech that they were ignoring me the whole time. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, my parents threw a hissy fit calling me ungrateful and disrespectful for wanting to do laundry and clean at home, instead of going out to their friends' house for dinner. They also disconnected the Internet to punish me when they left. I'm 20 and visiting home on a college break. FML
Today, my parents threatened to take away my college funds. Why? Because I complained about my 10 pm curfew during break as a freshman in college. FML
Today, my crazily elitist parents were so desperate to get me to dump my fiancé that they threatened to divorce if I didn't. When I told them to go ahead, they bitched me out for being disrespectful. FML
Today, I told my parents I don't really like children and probably won't have any in the future. They sat me down and gave me a lecture on how people who hate kids are heartless. FML
Today, I told my family about my dreams to get a modern car and house with my girlfriend, since I'm tired of fixing my '90s car and paying for my dad's rent and doing all his housework. They then told me I'm selfish for trying to leave them and that I don't care about them. FML
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Top comments
Crowned Sataness 12
Government should never ever have that much control of your life. I can't even tell you to go live with hippies because they are for freedom
RichardPencil 32
Not hippies. If you want to join people who use government to take away rights and freedoms from everyone, join the Republican Party. Just tell Ron DeSantis that meat is "woke," and you'll get your government-mandated vegetarianism next week.
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Comments (10)
Ubehage 32
I understand what you're saying. Though, I don't think it is a governmental job. We are 8 billion people, and it seems like the majority don't want to work for a better world. Democracy rules. Sit back, relax and enjoy the show.
Crowned Sataness 12
Government should never ever have that much control of your life. I can't even tell you to go live with hippies because they are for freedom
RichardPencil 32
Not hippies. If you want to join people who use government to take away rights and freedoms from everyone, join the Republican Party. Just tell Ron DeSantis that meat is "woke," and you'll get your government-mandated vegetarianism next week.
Marcella1016 32
LMAO sounds like the perfect plan actually.
bnapier 18
Republicans are after guns, cars, and freedom of speech? news to me. liberalism is a disease
Blobby McGee 5
you are part of the problem, thinking like that. Yes, let's give all control and trust to an institution that has a history of tyrannical control, and human rights violations. Wtf is wrong with you?
cpguru24 18
They were not wrong.
Brightside86 31
Sounds like something one of those Middle Eastern countries might do. Join the Taliban Reduce your carbon footprint and that of the American swine!
dreams2383 20
you really need to grow up and learn about the world. if all those things were banned you'll realize you can't get your precious Amazon orders and the economy and job market would collapse. your parents are right.
JasonThorn 23
If you are going to call on the government to change things, then you better offer alternatives that enrich them personally to see it happen quickly.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Yeah, no way am I going to be forced to drive an electric car, which would require me to completely upgrade my house's electrical system just to charge the damn thing. And not just me. In my area, electric cars are very rarely seen, and there's one charging station within a 50-mile radius. Banning meat? You do know people need protein to survive, right? Guns, eh, I don't care if they're banned or not - they're going to cause problems anyway.