Today, we went to the mall and my husband picked me out some perfume. When I asked him why he liked that particular one, he responded with, "That's what's the stripper at my bachelor party was wearing." He was completely serious. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, my loving fiancé informed me that my new perfume makes me smell like a urinal cake. FML
Today, I bought an expensive dress because it was me and my boyfriend's one year anniversary, and he was taking me somewhere nice. When he saw me in the dress, he looked at me, laughed and said, "Seriously, what are you wearing?" FML
Today, my boyfriend was continuously telling me how great my best friend smelled the other night and how I should wear some perfume that smelled like that. I have the same exact perfume and have been wearing it for months. FML
Today, I lied at a store when the checkout person told me the cologne I was buying was for men. I told him it was for my boyfriend. I haven't had a boyfriend in 2 years, I just wanted it to smell like one. FML
Today, I caught my husband trying on the sexy bra I bought to wear just for him. For shits and giggles, I made him try on my dress too. He looked better in it than I do. FML
Today, I got to spend the entire day shopping for lingerie with the man of my dreams. He bought everything I'd ever wanted and more! Too bad it was for another woman. FML
Today, I was at a party at the house of the guy I really like. We were talking when he pulled me into his room. I was excited he was finally taking our friendship to the next level, until he handed me a stick of deodorant, saying, "I didn't wanna tell you in the hallway, but you really need this." FML
Today, I left the house for a while and when I came back my husband was wearing my lacy lingerie. He looks better in it than I do. FML
Today, I asked my husband if he thought I was pretty. He replied "compared to what?" He was serious. FML
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Top comments
Reyo 2
No offence...but it sounds like you married a dumbshit. What kind of man discusses a relationship he's had with another woman to the woman he's supposed to be devoted to?
mich23 10
wow that blows, and she probably did too!
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Comments (94)
bigcrazymike 6
Wow, that's pretty insensitive.
arbmouser 0
Learn proper English, there is no better way to ruin a story. Illiterate, dumb-ass America...
Jason_Q 4
Bachelor party? Then that means you wasn't in his life back then? And maybe the stripper was hot and he's saying you're hot as well?
sketched_lilly 0
Think of it this way: He remembers the scent because it was one of the many highlights involved in the happiest day of his life: marrying you. Sure...it would have been much nicer if he had picked out a scent that reminded him of the flowers you had used to decorate the reception, but men can be daft. Sometimes rediculously so. If you still feel threatened, I suggest you pick between two choices: 1)Leave. 2) Get your sex kitten on and remind him why the stripper was momentary entertainment and you are keeping material.
jellyfish_ftw 0
uhh.....she's his wife, and it was his bachelor party. clearly she was the bride to be at that point. DUH.
CallMeHush 1
Most strippers smell GREAT, that said you would have to be a total dumb ass to admit it to your wife.
No_Heart 0
Yeah, but your probably a stupid bitch.
graveworm 0
somone obviously has a kinky mind just get the perfume and only put it in when you want to be his stripper, why make a deal out of it?
bosshaug 0
(Gilfred Godfrey's voice) ydi for looking like you smell like per
dragonsrock 0
OMG i swear sometimes men can be so stupid, thoughtless and careless. Most of them think with there dick.
LOKIM8 0
Well, wear the perfume and give him a lapdance before jumping his bones. He will be ever gratefull.