Today, my wife was about to take a shower, when she called me into the bathroom. She stripped me off and pulled me in with her. As I started to get into it, she sighed, "Thank god. You really needed a shower." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML
Today, I showered with my wife for the first time in months, so I was excited. Once we got in, she was adjusting the temperature to something more comfortable. She then turned around and tell me to suck in my gut. After I did so, I slipped and ate shit, smacking my head on the wall. FML
Today, I was in the mood for morning sex, but my wife told me to go wank it off in the bathroom. Three minutes later I was mid-wank when she started banging on the door because I was taking too long, and she needed to pee. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I haven't had sex for a long time, so when she got out of the shower I was ready on our bed to finally do it. Her response? "Really? Now? I just got out of the shower." FML
Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML
Today, at the end of another long workday, my husband announced that he was going to take a shower. Attempting to rekindle some much needed romance in our lives, I seductively asked him, "Want me to join you?" He replied, "Sure. But first I have to poop." FML
Today, my boyfriend looked at me and suggestively told me to take a shower. He's leaving for two days so I humored him, thinking he wanted to do it in the shower. I waited for 20 minutes before he knocked on the door, telling me he needed to shower as well. He just wanted me to take a shower. FML
Today, after not showering with my boyfriend in 3 months, he called me in to the bathroom and asked me to shower with him. After getting excited and ripping my clothes off, I get in and he asks me to wash his hair. FML
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
moop256 10
Your wife is pretty ******* smart ;)
that1guy1 13
Take the hint and start showering daily, use soap. You're lucky she didn't just hose you down and stick you with a bar of soap ties to a stick.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (94)
Flesheatinmonkey 3
Probley jokin
leafsrbest 0
Your having sex in the shower. Who gives a **** why?
pdp_fml 21
Cleanliness is next to Godliness, hasn't anyone told you this? Women don't like men that smell bad. Get a shower everyday and you will have more sex, guaranteed!
iranoutofnames 6
Well did you, you filthy ****? FHL, IMO.
Rachiebabyx 1
I would've asked for a towel before her dad came upstairs so that I wouldn't be butt naked but sorry ): he probably didn't even care that you were naked.
Rachiebabyx 1
And my itouch made me comment on the wrong FML ahaha embarrassment?
5t3ff1k4h 47
It's an iPod Touch, not an iTouch.
JulieMarie87 7
Stop whining and be glad you have a fun and flirty wife. And you may want to shower more.. nobody wants to make out with a slob.. ;)
jasony0423 0
So many people on here that don't shower daily, or even weekly from what I've seen. I'm glad I never went through that phase.
sincerelyjay 13
Looks like OP's going to go without showering more often.
Daederoth 10
Stripped you off? ... Idiot.
Okayitwasme 0
I see you were disappointed your opportunity was diverted. Showers can be fun. =)