Today, I asked my friend what form of birth control she used the first time she had sex. She stared at me like I was from another planet and said, "You can't get pregnant the first time..." This moron is my best friend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 16-year-old cousin told me she was "late." When I asked if she could be pregnant, she said no, because, "You can't get pregnant the first time you have sex." I ended up having to give her the sex talk. FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, my friend and I were having a casual discussion about sex. Blowjobs came up and my friend said she'd never dared to give one, arguing that swallowing sperm can make you pregnant. I then had to go on with a 30 minute argument with her on how that's not possible. She's 26. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML
Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML
Today, I told my friend I hadn't had a period in 5 months. She asked me if I was pregnant. When I asked her if I looked 5 months pregnant, she replied, "Is that supposed to be a trick question?" FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML
Today, my friend told me she wanted to get pregnant. I thought that was good news, but then she said she wanted my boyfriend to be the father of her baby. FML
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Top comments
niiick97_fml 3
what a dumbass
rattusrattus 19
I would say she should get together with the boys who think girls don't pee/poop/fart/burp... but I really don't want these idiots to breed.
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Comments (298)
SimonREWQ 0
Simple. Don't be her friend. You do understand you choose your friends right? Your fault for befriending her or choosing her as a friend in the first place due to your bad judgment. YDI.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Her stupidity doesn't tell you shit about who she is as a person. For all you know, she may be the most helpful friend OP has ever had, despite her lack of a brain. Would you want to lose the best friend you ever had just because they said something stupid (once again, for all you know this may be the first stupid comment OP's friend's ever said)?
feverdog88 0
or how about fhl?
ToxixShots 0
Dumbass
xgetxbentx 13
this is why we need sex ed, so morons like this, whose parents CLEARLY did not teach her enough, can actually get a decent education on the subject. op, fyl and I really hope you informed her that she was wrong.
Ray_of_midnight 23
::likes this::
DaniBee420 6
pls slap her for me
batgirl_babygirl 0
LMAO wow your friend is dumb lol
RavenNight 0
hey ur the one tht befriended her lol
DonBabyPeach 1
no ur all dumbasses , ur friend is right u cant the first time
flockingshpoo 0
I LIEK CHOKOLATE MILK
irish_sonic 0
your friends mom should have swallowed. then there would be one less dumbass in the world.