Today, my boyfriend was complaining of a scorpion sting on his leg. I told him to stop whining and get over it. Later, as I went to sleep, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. As I flipped on the light, I saw a scorpion crawling over the blankets. Now my entire arm is numb and I can't stop crying. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while packing up my classroom, I had a sudden stinging pain in my finger. Since I live in Arizona, my first thought was a black widow or scorpion, but the ER doctor didn't believe me and said it's nothing. Tell that to my tingling swollen arm. It’s been 4 hours. FML
Today, I woke up suddenly with giant bugs biting my legs. I screamed, ripped the blanket off the bed and bolted to the bathroom to recover. Turns out it was all a dream, and the person who needed to recover most was my shell-shocked boyfriend who had been sleeping soundly beside me. Sorry, babe. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night with a numb arm. When I tried to reposition it, it flew crazily and slapped my girlfriend in the face. My girlfriend, who was in a string of abusive relationships, and has severe PTSD. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, my fiancé heard I was having a rotten day at work. He stopped by the flower shop and bought me a lovely rose which I put right next to my work station. That is until a giant wasp flew out and stung me. I still have a swollen arm hours later. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, my significant other woke at 4:30 a.m. to me crying about a spider in the bathroom. I have an intense fear of spiders; he was super nice and took care of it for me. He even walked me out to my car. I started to calm down driving to work, but when I got there what do I see on the door handle but a spider. I'm still shaking. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML
Today, I was relaxing in bed with an arm kind of behind my head, when I noticed a huge spider resting on my armpit. My sister said my screaming sounded like a "witch being burned to death" for all of 5 seconds before I realized the "spider" was just my armpit hair. FML
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Top comments
taoxyeuxmay 4
Karma is sweet!
redbluegreen 41
Gosh, why can't you just 'get over it' yourself? I hate people who say shit like that.
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Comments (321)
Some___Guy 0
Medical attention? Hell no, I'm going to post about it online.
cheesesoda 0
True dat.
Kervik 0
Sheez, stop whining over it.
Leaveittosteven 0
Who would have thought that a ******* scorpion sting would hurt? Did you really not detect that you obviously deserved this FML before you posted it?
Thutboy 12
Isnt life a bitch!?!?
netbeui435 3
where the hell do you live that has so many scorpions?
RitzyHoke 0
karma sent an angel ... no wait, devil ... the karpion ... scorma ... that was lame, lol
Makaylaeatstoes 0
Karma. :]
Popple 0
YDI for being a bitch. A total bitch. I hope he dumps your un-caring ass and gets a girl who treats him right and would take his pain and feelings and a scorpion sting seriously....instead of whining about it after she gets stung. You're such a bitch. YDI to have gotten stung, and YDI to ahve him tell you "get over it".
gelatinskeleton 0
Wow, karma is a bitch and, apparently, so are you, OP.
burb_fml 0
Stop whining and get over it.
idfk_wtf 0
lmfao u deserved it.......|||||