Today, my boyfriend was complaining of a scorpion sting on his leg. I told him to stop whining and get over it. Later, as I went to sleep, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. As I flipped on the light, I saw a scorpion crawling over the blankets. Now my entire arm is numb and I can't stop crying. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while packing up my classroom, I had a sudden stinging pain in my finger. Since I live in Arizona, my first thought was a black widow or scorpion, but the ER doctor didn't believe me and said it's nothing. Tell that to my tingling swollen arm. It’s been 4 hours. FML
Today, I woke up suddenly with giant bugs biting my legs. I screamed, ripped the blanket off the bed and bolted to the bathroom to recover. Turns out it was all a dream, and the person who needed to recover most was my shell-shocked boyfriend who had been sleeping soundly beside me. Sorry, babe. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night with a numb arm. When I tried to reposition it, it flew crazily and slapped my girlfriend in the face. My girlfriend, who was in a string of abusive relationships, and has severe PTSD. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, my fiancé heard I was having a rotten day at work. He stopped by the flower shop and bought me a lovely rose which I put right next to my work station. That is until a giant wasp flew out and stung me. I still have a swollen arm hours later. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, my significant other woke at 4:30 a.m. to me crying about a spider in the bathroom. I have an intense fear of spiders; he was super nice and took care of it for me. He even walked me out to my car. I started to calm down driving to work, but when I got there what do I see on the door handle but a spider. I'm still shaking. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML
Today, I was relaxing in bed with an arm kind of behind my head, when I noticed a huge spider resting on my armpit. My sister said my screaming sounded like a "witch being burned to death" for all of 5 seconds before I realized the "spider" was just my armpit hair. FML
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Top comments
taoxyeuxmay 4
Karma is sweet!
redbluegreen 41
Gosh, why can't you just 'get over it' yourself? I hate people who say shit like that.
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Comments (321)
Essentials 0
WTF are you at that you're dumb enough to sleep where scorpions can get you? you're lucky it was just your arm and not your eye.
kingston52 0
WTF are you that dumb that you dont know that scorpians can climb onto a bed?
tsundere 1
YDI for being a bitch and then crying about the same thing that bothered your boyfriend. Instead of telling him to get over it, you should have helped him out with it. Karma stings, doesn't it?
ryan__h 1
FTW
EJade 0
Yeah, You deserved that one. Karma is sweet.
leofan15 0
aww. YDI though :
Shyman4ever 0
YDI for living in the scorpion infested Arizona.
Exhumed91 0
^^^this
mmlover600 0
cant scorpion bites kill you ?
zinka_fml 0
You have a SCORPION in your HOUSE? WTF?!!
Shannon_Kiwi 0
In Arizona, scorpions are pretty much everywhere.
roflcopterzzz 0
Here's a question: WHY THE **** DO YOU LIVE IN AN AREA WITH SCORPIONS? You deserved it. You had it coming.
bexox 0
Wtf? Seriously? You'd be surprised how common they are. Most of the ones in the U.S. aren't deadly to most people anyway. WHY DO YOU LIVE IN AN AREA WITH SO MANY SPIDERS?!?
hayride1987 0
thats not really the same thing... spiders are everywhere but scorpions are not!
cheertigers 0
karma karma karma, how do u have scorpions running around your house? I would cry if I saw that, I mean I've had a mouse one time, but never a scorpion eekkkk
flinkpamingo 0
We had them in our house growing up in Nevada. Can I say one word or three? FUMIGATE!! or MOVE!!