Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to call my wife while she was having a private lunch with my parents. I began to tell her all the nasty things I was going to do to her in bed. Halfway through my fantasy, she giggled and told me that she was going to take me off speakerphone. FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML
Today, after getting off the phone with a client, I got horny so I put on some porn and cranked one out. After I'd finished, I realized I hadn't ended the call and neither had my client. They heard everything. FML
Today, my boyfriend insisted that we try phone sex. He started telling me all the things he wanted to do to me while breathing heavily. Unfortunately, it sounded so ridiculous, I burst out laughing. He hung up on me, and has refused to pick up since. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML
Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
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Top comments
FranklySpeaking 11
Call him back and resume the sexy talk. Since he missed out on some of it, you can do it even better this time.
Capitan 15
At least you got some good practice in.
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Comments (69)
Camri_123 11
At least you had fun!
xAstronomicx 13
Sometimes it's hard for us to get to a point where you are comfortable doing that for a loved one. Though it may have embarrassed you, I'm sure he enjoyed it until it dropped. Hopefully next time you have better Luck.
frenchiegirl1 6
Don't feel bad! Chances are he quickly left to relieve himself thanks to you ;)
6dandaman5 8
If your not already laughing about it you both will be some day , trust me it'll make a good story some day
Ash7419 5
Keep it up you will do good one day in front of him
hzxrd 7
Maybe he hung up after he "finished"??
koolkanga 12
Talk dirty to me. *saxophone music*
bombielol 20
try again later :)
Taurus_ChicKa 37
At least it wasn't on speaker phone or something! :D
shellylove2013 9
Save it for when he's home. Let it build up, makes it that much better!!