Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to call my wife while she was having a private lunch with my parents. I began to tell her all the nasty things I was going to do to her in bed. Halfway through my fantasy, she giggled and told me that she was going to take me off speakerphone. FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML
Today, after getting off the phone with a client, I got horny so I put on some porn and cranked one out. After I'd finished, I realized I hadn't ended the call and neither had my client. They heard everything. FML
Today, my boyfriend insisted that we try phone sex. He started telling me all the things he wanted to do to me while breathing heavily. Unfortunately, it sounded so ridiculous, I burst out laughing. He hung up on me, and has refused to pick up since. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML
Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
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Top comments
FranklySpeaking 11
Call him back and resume the sexy talk. Since he missed out on some of it, you can do it even better this time.
Capitan 15
At least you got some good practice in.
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Comments (69)
Goblin182 27
5 minutes and he didn't call back? Sorry OP, you need to brush up on your phone sex skills.
asparagus12 21
That was my first thought. Why didn't he call back? He was the one listening so he def should have noticed the call was dropped.
smc3106 25
It's possible that he was doing the same thing and both of them didn't notice. Lol
worldclassrager 41
Call back and go at it again...what else can you do?
mchmelev1993 10
Lololol it at least got your juices flowing??
A07 48
He should have atleast called you back!
Futacy 30
What it sounds like to me is that you were trying too hard. If you open your mouth, and it sounds like something a guy would think, you're definitely trying too hard.
cwall882 1
His girlfriend probably walked in and did more than talk about it.
tayymeds 23
I hope it was just due to poor signal OP!
Solipsist 12
Sounds like his real fantasy was to no longer be talking to you.... :D
lillithraven95 11
Hahah oh boy! That sound indeed embarrassing >_< Too bad you didn't get to share the story with your husband! There are always other times to make it happen though, good luck! :)
LuvMissKay 4
Can somebody tell me what op means
maggiefox 25
Original poster
asparagus12 21
How about you turn to google before posting this on the comment feed.