Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a guy I've been seeing called me really drunk again to talk about his and his cat's angst. He put me on speaker so I could have a meowing-conversation with his cat to soothe her. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend called me by my best friend's name in bed. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend got high and decided to text all our friends and family the crazy stories about us. He was even nice enough to include pictures. I hear a nude one made it to my Dad. FML
Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML
Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML
Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML
Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML
Today, I purposely misspelled words while texting my boyfriend so he would think I was out partying and having a life. FML
Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML
Today, I told my friend about a fight I had earlier with my girlfriend. He thought it'd be funny to use my phone while I was in the bathroom and text her "ure such a cunt". She wouldn't believe the truth, even when my friend confessed to her. She thought I paid him to take the fall. FML
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Top comments
CateXOX 0
Why did he have pictures of you losing your virginity? Hmm mean friend :( But next time don't annoy him.
spencerchu 0
lesson learned don't piss people off
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Comments (141)
desser627 0
dumbass.
SulfurPlague 0
meow
jwing 0
and the best friends award goes to......... somebody else.
kykyshay 0
meow!
fizzpoplady 3
Why, sure, Mr. Weed Man! I'm sure OP would just love to buy some of your classy American pot, so why don't you hop a plane to New Zealand and hook her up, yo! You're an idiot.
maddyjayneexox 4
meow to you tooo
Darcon 8
why the fudge wud he have pictures of u losing your V ?
califathugs13 0
he's gay he lost his virginity to his friend
Tom_Warrilow 0
he has pictures of u loosing ur virginity ??
chattysoul890 18
were you having a threesome or something with your friend? because last time i checked friends dont have pictures of you having sex