Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
Today, I started coming on to my girlfriend, only to get a nasty rejection. I told her I would just go jerk off, to which she replied, "Don't you dare!" FML
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
Today, I woke up with a raging hard on. My wife, who was also awake, felt it when I pressed against her. She said, "No thank you," got up, and walked away. FML
Today, my hand fell asleep while I was masturbating. My own body rejected me. FML
Today, I caught my husband masturbating to porn. I screamed at him and demanded to know why he was masturbating when he has a wife to have sex with. He said, "Because you always reject me?" I was about to yell back when I realized he was right. I'm a terrible wife. FML
Today, after weeks of every excuse not to, my wife wanted sex. It was amazing, and she had at least 3 orgasms. Instead of cuddling afterwards, she got up like someone kicked her and started bitching about all the things she could have been doing, as she got dressed and stormed out. FML
Today, I masturbated 3 times to the thought of my wife because we don't have sex anymore. FML
Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a copy of War and Peace. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML
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Top comments
caancoha 0
How do you not deserve this? "Treat others as you would like to be treated." Go luck your wounded manhood.
Heartside 0
Seriously. Wow. You deserved that. Good for her.
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Comments (135)
eagleeye4042 0
hahaha any wife who knows how to handle herself like that is a treasure, what the hell were you thinking? they always say you dont know what you got until its gone
skeleton_skinner 0
YDI! Ass.
suckstosuck84 0
BLUE BALLS!!!!! MOFO
Sunnytweet79 0
Wats up with people writing long comments...It's not that serious !!
FMLLOLL 0
HAHAHAHA UR WIFE IS FUNNY THIS IS SOOO FUNNY!! even i would be embarrassed to do the same she has balls
Peedz69 0
first of all lol... what man rejects his wife for sex lmao! are you retarted! hahah
KamilleBlack 3
Haha! U deserve it. How dare u turn her down?!? Then ask for sex right after?!? Are u on drugs. xD YDI
Ceyenna 0
Serves you right.
post_insanity1 0
ydi for being a dumb ******* idiot
value 0
ive been there its not fair goddammit. only fortunatley my girlfriend was more forgiving.